He smiled at me softly and reached up to grab my wrist to test my pulse. “I’m Chris. Can you tell me your name?” he said, watching the seconds on his watch and staring at my eyes to follow their movement.

“I’m Nolan,” I said, quiet and mortified.

“Nolan, nice to meet you,” he smiled again, that fake smile someone gives when they’re suspicious of you and trying to unravel your mystery. “Your pulse seems okay. Can you tell me, have you ever fallen like this before? Do you know how much water you’ve had today? Were you feeling dizzy before you started your workout? Did you trip? Do you feel nauseous…?” Chris was hitting me with question after question before I could even answer. My head was bobbing back and forth, like I was watching a tennis match just trying to respond and keep up with him. I was hearing his words echo, and my heart rate was racing again when I had a sudden break.

“I just had a miscarriage,” I said, slapping my hand over my mouth and closing my eyes tight trying to force the reality back into hiding.

I felt Chris’s hands on my wrist again, pulling my hand from my face and forcing me to look at him. “Okay. That’s definitely what led to you passing out. And it’s okay, Nolan. Do you hear me? It’s okay. You probably shouldn’t be working out now, though. You are likely extremely dehydrated, and your body is exhausted. Do you…I mean have you…talked to anyone?” Chris was being careful with me. I didn’t like feeling so weak, so I straightened my posture and shook my head with my last vestiges of confidence.

“No, I’m fine,” I said, forcing myself to stand and dry my tears. My legs still felt wobbly, but I wasn’t going to let anyone here see that.

“Okay, well…you really need to see someone. It can help. What happened…it’s not something that’s uncommon. But it’s also not something that is easy to deal with always,” Chris seemed uncomfortable. So was I.

“I’m fine, really,” I forced again, giving him a flat smile and willing him to drop it.

“All right, I hear you. I’d just feel better if you at least met with one of the physicians at the health center today. Hmmmm?” Chris nodded at me, begging me to consider.

“I have an appointment Tuesday,” I was defensive now, even my false pleasantries gone.

He just stared at me in silence for a few seconds, considering his move. “I’m not trying to be intrusive. I’m only looking out for your health here. You shouldn’t wait until Tuesday. Maybe just drop by for an urgent care visit, huh?” he was really trying. I gave in and nodded.

I saw Gavin walking up with the bottle of water, and I reached out to shake Chris’s hand. “Thanks. I appreciate your advice,” I forced a closed mouth smile then grabbed the bottle of water from Gavin. “Can you walk me to the Health Center, and then home? It seems I’m dehydrated and need some rest.”

“Sure,” Gavin said, pulling my arm over his shoulder once again, letting me lean most of my weight on him. “Let’s go. Thanks for looking her over.”

Chris the trainer just smiled tightly, nodding, and packed up his small, useless box. I made eye contact with him and could tell he had thought he’d put my puzzle together. But he wasn’t even close.

Reed

I’d managed to sleep hard last night after going a few rounds with Jason. He was already bitching about having to take my dad to an appointment next week in Tucson, like it was some major inconvenience—never mind the fact that he’d be driving into town to take care of business at the Tucson dealerships anyhow.

Sometime over the past year, I’d started challenging my brother. I don’t know if it was something that changed inside of me, maturity perhaps, or if my brother had just managed to become yet an even bigger ass**le.

Dylan stopped by my pop’s house on her way from Tucson to Phoenix to run through a few scenarios with me and to pass along some messages from her father. We sat at the counter and went over some things and Jason—not to miss out on the attention from a hot blonde—pulled up a seat to join us, quickly taking over the conversation. Dylan seemed to be annoyed by his presence at first. But when I mentioned some of my hesitation over everything and how it was going to affect Nolan, she was suddenly won over by my dickhead brother’s insensitivity.

“You’re such a pu**y over that girl. When you go big time, you’re going to have chicks throwing themselves at you. You’ll be so over your cute, little high school f**k. Don’t make life decisions because of it,” he said. What a dickhead. I hated him.