“What’s so awkward about it?”

She shrugged. “It feels wrong, somehow… because you and I are—because we live together.” Her verbal gymnastics were not lost on me. She was as in the dark about what this was between us as I was.

Her fingers unbuttoned the second button. I decided it would be safer to change the subject and get her the hell off my lap. “Hey, I was thinking we should take the Duffy boat out and go down to the end of the jetty. Or we can go to the Fun Zone…”

“Or…we can stay here,” she said, her hand slipping inside my shirt.

I took a deep breath and willed my hormones under control. Her hand on my bare skin was doing strange things to my ability to even think straight. I reached up and gently pulled it out of my shirt.

“Aren’t we getting together online with Heath and Kat today?” Heath couldn’t come over because he had a cold and Emilia couldn’t be around anyone who had any type of illness. The chemo made her highly susceptible to bacteria and viruses due to her suppressed immune system.

She frowned, watching me. “I think they wanted to, yeah.”

“Good. Do you want to go outside and go for a walk or something before we do that? You’ll be stuck inside for a little while after tomorrow.”

She blinked and slid from my lap, standing up. I almost sighed in relief.

“Uh. Yeah, sure. Let’s do that.”

I stood up and moved past her to grab our sweatshirts and put my shoes on. I tried to ignore the puzzled look she gave me as I passed by her. It was a mixture of surprise and hurt. I was aware I’d just rejected her advances—and that it probably hurt her feelings. I made a mental note to discuss it with her later. But not now.

Because right now, if I didn’t get out of here, I was likely to do something I’d regret—something I really wanted to do—like pull her back into my lap again and kiss her senseless. I’d assured her we should go slow and if I didn’t stick to my guns, disaster was likely waiting in the wings. So I willed my hormones to calm down and we got outside into the fresh air, where there was no danger of temptation.

Chapter Fifteen

Mia

“Take that you green-faced fucktard!” I yelled into the mic of my headset. Shooting off another fireblast spell, I pasted a stray orc against the wall of the fortress we were fighting our way through. Obediently, the orc burst into flames and was no more.

“Such violence, Mia,” Heath’s laughing voice came through the earpiece on the headset.

“Mmm. I’m in that kind of mood,” I replied, using another high-level spell on a very low-level monster and thus vaporizing it. Hell had no fury like a sexually frustrated woman who’d just been rejected by the object of her lust.

“What up, girlfriend?” Kat asked. “Everything okay?”

I gritted my teeth and fired off another over-the-top spell. “Just fucking peachy.”

“Anyone know if FallenOne is going to log in?”

I bit my tongue. After our walk along the beach, he’d left me to go get started with our group while he finished up some things in his office, promising to join us as soon as he could. I’d hardly heard most of what he’d said. I’d still been mentally licking my wounds from earlier. He’d been perfectly sweet to me during the entire walk. But I knew he was still mad at me. Why else would he keep pushing me away? And just how slow did he mean we should go? I’d only been here a couple weeks and I already hated this plan of his.

Unless there was another reason…and that was the other thing that smarted. Because I wasn’t an idiot. I saw myself in the mirror every morning. I was perfectly aware that I was beginning to look like the Queen of the Borg from Star Trek. Between the pale, sallow skin, the darkening veins in my arms, and the bald head, I was sure I made up the perfect sexy picture. I frankly couldn’t blame him for being revolted, though I’d hoped he wouldn’t be.

I blinked away the sting of that feeling by reminding myself that this was all temporary. These losses wouldn’t be forever, unlike others…

I focused on the computer screen in front of me. A horde of goblins came running around the corner of our corridor where we’d slaughtered their orc cousins. I wasted them all with my highest-level spell.

“Mia!” Heath hissed. “Stop wasting all your high-level magic. We’re going to need that later when we get to the boss.” Heath referred to the big bad monster that was the one carrying all the best loot, the one we’d most likely find at the end of this foray.