Chapter 22


Reaper opened his eyes and tried to take stock. His head was pounding, and he wasn't sure where the hell he was. He seemed to be lying on the floor of a small place, and there were others there, too.

"He's awake," someone whispered.

Reaper turned his head slightly to the right. Two men were sitting in a seat ahead of him. A vehicle seat, its back between him and them. So they were in a vehicle. But it didn't seem to be moving. Both men were turned sideways, their eyes on him intently, expectantly.

His brain cleared a little. The one on the left was Seth. But he didn't know the other man. He closed his eyes tightly, because looking at them hurt. Thinking hurt even more.

"Reaper?" Seth asked. "Can you hear me?"

"Of course I can hear you." He brought his head up-too sharply-with his reply, and the kid jerked backward at the movement.

There was fear in his eyes. And it was a fear Reaper had seen before. He blinked and tried to remember, but found only a black hole. Then he looked past Seth and the stranger to the next set of seats, where Roxy sat behind the wheel, staring at him, a sadness in her eyes that went beyond anything he'd ever seen. Beside her, in the passenger side, Vixen watched him with all the wariness of a wild animal awaiting attack. She sat very still, the way a rabbit did, as if thinking that made it invisible to a predator stalking slowly toward it. She might even have been trembling a little. And her wide eyes were riveted to him.

A sickness was beginning to uncoil in his stomach. It was one he'd felt several times in his past. He recognized that he was in the van, and that it was parked. He was lying on the floor. He knew some members of his little tribe were missing. Topaz. Briar. Slowly he turned his head the other way, to the bench seat in the rear of the van.

Topaz was lying there, still, unconscious, her face bruised, her body in pain-he felt it, and opened his mind to the signals and energy wafting from her. Her ribs were broken.

He'd done that to her.

He sat up all at once, lurching onto his knees, toward the van's side door, then hauled it open and all but fell out. Dragging himself to his feet, he stumbled into a nearby stand of weeds and gagged.

A hand pressed to his back, firm but comforting. Seth's hand.

"Dude, it's all right. Tope's gonna be fine. It'll be daylight soon, and she'll recover with the day sleep."

Gasping for breath, Reaper wiped his mouth with the back of his hand, even though nothing had come up. His eyes were watering until he could barely see, but he wasn't sure he could look his young protege in the eyes anyway. "I did that to her."

"It wasn't your fault. Briar locked you in the club, and then she said whatever word it is that sets you off. Look, it wasn't you, Reap. I know that. We all know that."

"Briar?" He frowned and searched Seth's face. "She did that?"

Seth lowered his eyes and nodded.

"You're sure. It wasn't Gregor or-"

"She admitted it. Everyone heard her. I mean, she said she didn't know what would happen. She said she was just following orders, but I'm telling you, man, I'm not sure I believe her. That bitch is evil."

"She locked herself in with us, Seth." Roxy had come out of the van and was standing only a few feet away. "If she knew what that trigger word would do to Reaper, she would have said it, then ducked out and locked the door behind her. She would have been stupid not to."

"She was stupid," Seth argued. "Following that bastard Gregor's instructions without even knowing why or what the consequences would be. She could have gotten us all killed."

"I imagine that was the intent. She never claimed to be on our side," Roxy said. "And I agree, she's a bitch. But I don't think she's a suicidal one. And we can't assume she would have acted the same had she known the consequences."

"Bullshit."

Reaper held up a hand, and they both fell silent. "Where is she now? Did I-did I kill her?"

"No, of course you didn't kill her!" Roxy snapped. "Raphael, I've told you before, I do not believe you could murder an innocent, even when you're under the control of the brainwashing."

"Are you calling that lunatic an innocent?" Seth muttered.

Reaper ignored his comment, instead flinging out an arm and pointing toward the van. "Look what I did to Topaz. Topaz, for God's sake!" He lowered his arm, because it was shaking and he was ashamed. He needed to get away from these people-for their own good. If Gregor-and now Briar-had his trigger, he was a weapon, and he could be used to kill even those he...cared for. "I don't suppose you know what the trigger word was?"

"No," Roxy said. "Briar...left before I could get her out of earshot of you to tell us. And Gregor never gave her the second one, the deactivation word."

"She left," Reaper said. "Explain that, please."

Roxy nodded, coming closer, taking him by the arm and leading him back toward the van. "We stopped at a traffic light, and she jumped out. Not, however, before helping us get out of that club alive."

"She was helping herself," Seth snapped.

"That's your opinion," Roxy said calmly.

"She left with us because it was the best option for her. And I'll tell you something else, that Jack character did exactly the same thing. Those two cannot be trusted. I'm glad Briar left, and I'd just as soon drop her comrade off at the nearest cemetery and be done with the both of them."

They were at the van now, and none of them was under any illusion that their conversation had been private. Vampire hearing was, after all, acute, and they'd been speaking aloud.

Reaper gripped the sides of the van and pulled himself in. Vixen still sat tensely in the front passenger seat. Jack had moved all the way to the rear, sitting on the edge of the seat where Topaz lay, his eyes on her still form, but he turned when Reaper entered.

"Your fledgling friend is right, Reaper. I left that club with you because it was the option that gave me the best chance of survival. But you can believe any loyalty I felt toward Gregor is long gone. He tried to get me killed tonight. And her, too," he added, with a long look at Topaz.

"So your loyalty lies with us, now?"

"Don't you believe it," Seth said, climbing into the van behind Reaper. Roxy got into the driver's seat. "How do we know he's not a plant?"

"If he was a plant, Gregor would have taken steps to ensure he wouldn't get killed with the rest of you when I was triggered," Reaper said.

"How do you know he didn't?" Seth shot a hateful look back at Jack. "How do you know Gregor didn't give him the second word, the deactivation code? He could have had it all along, with instructions to use it only when his own neck was on the chopping block. Maybe Briar's, too."

"If I knew the deactivation word, don't you think I would have used it when he was kicking the hell out of Topaz?"

"Right, Topaz, the chick you screwed out of a half million bucks. The chick you left with a broken heart. That Topaz, right?"

Jack lowered his head.

"This is getting us nowhere," Reaper said. "It's enough. And none of it matters, anyway, because it's clearly me Gregor wants, not any of you."

"He wants us, all right. He wants us dead." Seth sat down hard in the middle seat.

"Only to make it easier for him to get to Reaper," Vixen said. Her voice was very soft, barely more than a whisper, but she spoke with certainty. And when they all looked at her expectantly, she went on. "I know him. Jack does, too. Gregor is lazy, and basically, a coward. He gets others to fight his battles for him. Others take all the risks, do all the work. He reaps the benefits."

Then she hesitated, as if suddenly unsure of herself.

"Vixen, keep talking," Reaper said. "Tell us what you think. You clearly have an idea about all this."

She brought her head up again, her eyes meeting Reaper's. "He set you up. Locked us all in a room together and convinced Briar to trigger you into a rage. He expected everyone in that room to be killed. He expected all of us to die, except for you, and what would have happened after that?"

Reaper frowned, searching his mind. "I would have continued raging until I was spent, I guess. Until I passed out or the day sleep took me."

Seth picked up the story. "I can tell you what would have happened next. Reaper would have been found right there, at that club, surrounded by dead bodies. Mortal authorities could never hold him, but they would try. Word would get out that he had become the most deadly rogue of them all. The vampire community would turn against him. He would be hunted, just as Gregor is." Seth looked Reaper in the eye. "You would have had no one left to come to your aid. And you would have gone after him for vengeance, but you would have gone alone."

Reaper turned in his seat to look back at Jack. "You agree with that assessment?"

"I do. I don't know why he wants you or what he has planned once he gets you. But this all fits with what I overheard on the phone. He said something about making you the most deadly, dangerous rogue in history, turning both mortals and vampires against you. It's pretty clear he wants you alive. And I personally think he's working for someone else, rather than himself. But, yeah, he wants you alone," Jack said.

"Then that's what he's going to get."

"You can't, Reap," Seth said. "He's still got you at a disadvantage. He's got the damned drones, a whole army of the bastards. He's got your triggers. He can control your freaking mind, pal. It's no good, not like that."

"We need to stick together," Vixen said. "If getting you alone is what Gregor wants, then that's the last thing we should give him. Why play right into his hands?"

"Because by staying with you, I'm putting you at risk." Reaper looked around the van at each of them, his gaze lingering on Topaz, lying so still in the back. "I could have killed you. All of you. Gregor will trigger me again. If getting me alone is his goal, then getting rid of you is essential to his plan. Unless I get rid of you first."

"I won't leave you, Reap," Seth said. "No way. No way in hell. I'm with you in this. You saved my life, and I owe you."

Reaper sighed, knowing he wasn't going to be able to give Seth, or any of them, a choice in the matter. He needed to go after Gregor alone. He needed to see to it that his little gang was safe while he did so. And he needed to find Briar.

His last clear memory, before the moment when they'd walked into the club, was of having explosive sex with her in the front seat of the Mustang. It had been intense. It had been insane. And more than just a mating of bodies-they'd shared blood. That created a bond.

He could feel her, even now. She was thinking about him, too. She was alone, and she was angry. Furious. Cursing him as she searched the night for another man.

For Gregor.

You might as well forget him, Briar, Reaper thought, sending the message out to her on the wings of the night. You belong to me now, and I promise you, I'm coming to claim you. Soon.

He didn't expect a reply, so he was surprised when he heard one whispering through his mind, so full of turmoil that it felt like a million tiny electric shocks were zipping through his brain along with the message.

I belong to no one. It was just sex, Reaper. It was a delaying tactic. Get over it.

You lie.

You think so? Try to come for me again and you'll find out, I promise. I'll kill you if I can.

I'm not your enemy, Briar.

You beat the living hell out of me, and all your friends tonight. You took me from Gregor, gave him cause to distrust me. If you're not an enemy, then I've never had one.

I hurt you? The realization almost made him want to throw up again. I'm sorry.

Fuck you, Reaper.

She threw a block around her mind then, cutting herself off from him so thoroughly that there was no chance of him reaching her again. He sighed, glanced up to the front seat at Roxy. "Why are we just sitting here?" he asked.

"Well, I didn't dare take us back to the warehouse. Briar's liable as not to tell Gregor where we were. You didn't blindfold her on the way to the meeting."

"I didn't intend to let her leave with him."

"I know. Anyway, we need another place. And we'd probably better make it soon."

"There's a freight yard," Jack said.

Everyone turned to look at him. He shrugged. "Boxcars make good beds. No windows. I've used them before, in a pinch. Not exactly five-star accommodations, but-"

"Do not trust that man," Seth said.

Reaper narrowed his eyes on Jack, wondering if he was a good enough con to set them all up for another attack by Gregor. And that was when Topaz spoke, her lips moving slowly, her voice weak. "You can trust him," she said.

Jack looked more surprised than anyone else in the vehicle.

"Not with your hearts, but...yeah. With your lives, he's okay."

"I agree with her," Vixen said.

Jack's apparently stunned expression grew even more amazed.

Reaper nodded. "Jack, climb up front and give Roxy directions, if you would."

Jack made his way to the front, and once he'd gone by, Reaper moved to the back and sat where Jack had been, beside Topaz. He stared down at her, afraid to touch her, unsure how to begin.

She opened her swollen eyes. "I owe you a kick in the balls," she said. Her voice was strained. "Remind me when I'm feeling better, will you?"

"I'm sorry," he whispered. "I don't know what I can do to make this up to you, princess, but I promise, I will."

"Oh, you are damn right you will." She lifted a hand, closed it around his. It was ice-cold, her grip weak, and she was trembling. "I know it wasn't you," she whispered.

"That doesn't make it all right. I put you all at risk by letting you come along with me on this mission in the first place. I never should have done that. I knew better."

"We were forewarned. We made a choice."

"She's right," Seth said. He was in the center seat, leaning over, listening in. "You gave us all the information, even armed us so we could shoot your sorry ass if you got out of line. We can choose to leave if the reality is too scary for us."

Reaper lowered his head, certain that it wasn't a choice he would or could give them. It was his choice, his responsibility. If he killed one of them next time-hell, how would he live with that?

He realized with no small measure of surprise that he'd come to care about these misfits. In spite of himself.

"We're vampires," Seth went on. "Maybe not as old or as wise or as strong as you. Maybe not as experienced or as tough as you. But we're vampires, Reaper. Immortals. The undead. We have as much right to make our own decisions, take our own risks, as anyone else. As much right as Damien himself. As much right as the oldest, the first."

Reaper nodded as if he agreed. He didn't, but they would only argue if he tried to reason with them. Turning, he glanced through the windshield at the sky. "How long before we get to the freight yard?" he asked.

"Ten minutes," Jack said. "Give or take."

"Good. We have just under an hour until dawn." Then he closed his eyes. "I wonder where..."

"Gregor is?" Seth asked. Then he grinned. "I'd have damn well loved to see his face when he walked into that club, expecting to find us all dead and you out of your mind, exhausted or unconscious, just waiting for him to take you. And instead he found us all gone, and a few dozen bullet-hole-riddled drones littering the sidewalk."

"And a few more torn to shreds by Vixen's friends," Roxy added with a laugh. She met Reaper's puzzled eyes. "We can explain that later," she said.

Reaper hardly noticed what she said, because he hadn't been wondering where Gregor was at all. He'd been wondering about Briar. Had she made it back to that black-hearted bastard? Was she even now curling into his arms?

Having sex with him? Drinking from him? Letting him drink from her? Kissing him?

The thought damn near sent him into a brand-new frenzy. And that made him angry, because dammit, he didn't want to give a shit about her.

She was treacherous, and she was deadly.

And he wanted her more than he wanted to wake up at sundown.

The boxcars didn't offer much in the way of privacy. Not that Vixen thought it really mattered anymore. Seth, however, seemed to have other ideas.

As the others were claiming their space in the forty-foot-long-by-ten-foot-wide metal box, Vixen reached for the handle to pull herself up and in. Seth stopped her, a hand on the small of her back to get her attention.

She jumped and looked back at him, startled by the contact.

"Sorry. Didn't mean to scare you."

"I'm tense and jumpy after...after all that death back there. It was-"

"I know."

She nodded. "So many innocent lives, just snuffed out. And for no reason. Why didn't he just clear the place out? Why kill them all?"

"You heard Jack's theory. Gregor wants to convince the world-the undead world, at least-that Reaper is no better than he is. That he murders the innocent just as brutally, just as carelessly."

"But how would that benefit him?"

Seth shrugged. "Until we know what he's after, we can't even guess. But I don't want to talk to you about that."

"No, I don't suppose you want to talk to me at all." She lowered her eyes, nodded once and turned to reach for the handle again. It was high above her head. She didn't really need it; she could have jumped. She just didn't feel moved to expend a single ounce of energy. She felt dead inside. Like the mortals littering the floor of The Crypt.

"I do, actually. I think...I think we need to talk."

"I don't think I can."

He frowned. "I want to know about you, who you are. What you are, or were. What it means. You know?"

"No, you don't."

He frowned at her. "Yes, I do. You...you called in the help of the animals back there. You saved our asses by doing it. And you risked your neck for me."

She shrugged. "It was no risk. I could have shifted and run away before any of those clumsy drones could have touched me."

"Now you're lying."

She shot him a glare.

"I saw you change, remember? It took a few minutes. They would have killed you before you changed completely."

Sighing, she turned to face him fully. "Fine. I'll tell you what I am. Or what I was, anyway. I was a human who was possessed by the spirit of the fox, my totem, in a way far beyond what is normal, as were my mother before me and hers before her, and on and on. My great great great grandmother was full-blooded Iroquois. Daughter of the chief of her tribe, whose family totem was the red fox. My great great great grandfather was a Scot, blood and bone, of the clan McFarland. His family crest bore the face of a fox. And since the days when those two reproduced, the firstborn female of every generation has had the gift.

"And it is a gift, Seth, though it might seem a curse to you."

He lowered his head, seeming ashamed. "So you really are human."

"No," she said. "I'm a vampire. Now."

"But before..."

She closed her eyes. "Human, yes. But not by choice."

He closed a hand around her shoulder, turned her to face him. "Explain that to me. Come on, let's sit a while."

"We don't have much time."

"We have a little." He led her to a nearby handcar, took a seat.

Reluctantly, she perched beside him, but on the very edge, her toes touching the ground, knees bent, hands braced. She was ready to spring up and run.

He'd hurt her. She didn't like that kind of pain, emotional pain. She wasn't used to it, didn't understand it. She only knew for certain that she never wanted to feel it again.

The night was waning. Crickets and frogs chirped, and the cool breeze chilled her, though not in the usual way. She felt cold, but no discomfort.

"You said you were human, but not by choice," he prompted.

She nodded. "I've always preferred the company of animals to that of people. I've always loved my time as a fox far more than my time as a woman. Human emotions seemed foolish to me. All heat and anger, joy and sorrow. All pain and pleasure. No balance, no common sense. Just a roller coaster of dizzying highs and heartbreaking lows and sudden twists and turns you could never anticipate."

"And life as a fox?"

"Oh." She sighed, and she felt her shoulders relax a bit, and her lips curve into a smile. "So much better. It's logical, you know? It's about finding enough to eat, avoiding enemies, hunting, playing and being warm and comfortable. It's about using your senses, paying attention, listening and watching and scenting the air. It's about being wild and free. Free of so much, of worry, of stress. You don't worry when you're an animal. What happens, happens. It's nature."

He nodded slowly, and said, "I see," but she didn't think he possibly could.

"So I spent as much time as I could in that form. Several hours every day. I lived among the wild things, far more than anyone else in my family ever had. I learned to communicate with them. But I couldn't be one with them, because I didn't belong. I didn't feel I belonged with people, either. So when I was in human form, I kept to myself. I avoided others. Relationships. Complications. Worry. I tried to live the way my friends in the forest lived. Without worry or fear or highs and lows. Just surviving and taking as much comfort as possible in every day, every hour, every moment."

"And how has that changed?"

She shifted her gaze. It had ostensibly been directed at the sky, but in reality it had been turned inward. She hadn't been seeing anything other than the past as it unfolded behind her eyes. Now she looked at him. And she thought he was truly listening.

"The longer I spent in fox form, the stronger I became. The stronger I became, the longer I could maintain the form. The easier it was to shift. By the time Gregor found me, I was able to spend around six hours each day as a fox. Some days, I could even manage four hours in the morning and four more in the evening."

"How did he find you?"

She lifted her brows. "I got caught in a trap while chasing rabbits near his mansion. I didn't know I was one of the Chosen. He must have felt me near, known instinctively I was in trouble and come to my aid, as every vampire is compelled to do. But instead of a human, he found a wounded fox. And yet he felt it, that I was one of the Chosen. So he took me back to the mansion, held me in a cell, and watched and waited. And when I changed back, he saw, and then he knew."

Seth was nodding very slowly. "And then what happened?"

She averted her eyes, turning her head away, getting to her feet. "He changed me. That's all. The rest you know." She swallowed hard. "Since the change, I've been weaker. I can only manage to shift forms a few times a week. And I can only maintain my fox shape for an hour or so. I've found I can go out in daylight as a fox, without harm. But if I changed back while exposed to the sun, I'm certain I would go up in flames."

He got up, too. "I'm sorry, Vixen. I mean it. I'm sorry you lost something so precious to you, but more than that, I'm sorry I reacted the way I did to learning your secret. I...I'd like another chance."

"I wouldn't," she said without looking at him. And then she started walking back toward the railroad car.

He ran to catch up, caught her by the forearm, turned her to face him. "Wait a minute. What do you mean?"

"With you, Seth, I experienced those emotions I've avoided all my life," she told him. "And do you know what I ended up feeling most of all?" She watched his face, waited for him to answer. When he didn't, she went on. "More than desire, more than passion, more than love and longing and need, I felt pain. And it was far worse than the pain of the collar I wore for Gregor, when Briar's sadistic nature made her press the button and send shocks through my body. It was far worse than the pain of having my leg bitten almost in two by the teeth of a cruel trap. It was the most crippling, most horrible pain I have ever felt in my life. And you inflicted it on me. You, Seth. When you rejected me."

"I'm sorry. God, I'm so sorry."

She shrugged. "Being sorry doesn't take it away. It's a fresh wound, Seth, but one I'm certain will leave a vivid scar. It's not something I can ever forget. And it's definitely not something I ever want to feel again. For you to say 'give me another chance' is as if Gregor were saying to me, 'give the collar another chance, Vixen. It won't hurt this time. I promise.'" She held Seth's eyes, though his image became distorted through her tears.

"No, Seth," she whispered. "I'm afraid I can't give you another chance to hurt me that way again. You or...or anyone else, for that matter."

"I swear to God, I'll never hurt you like that again."

She smiled very gently, lifted a hand to touch his cheek and whispered, "I know you won't."

And then she lowered her hand and turned to walk to the boxcar, ignoring his calls to her to wait, to listen, to give him a shot. She climbed inside and strode straight to Reaper, who sat with his knees bent upward and his back against the wall. Her mind spoke to his, and his alone.

I know what you're planning, and I'm going with you.

I don't know what you're talking about.

You're going to go after Gregor alone. I know him. I know the mansion. I know Briar.

You could be hurt.

I'm a shape-shifter, Reaper. That's the secret I've been keeping. Everyone knows it now but you, so I suppose I might as well tell you. I can change into a fox and maintain that form for an hour at a time. I can go out in daylight in that form. I get into places where others cannot hope to go. I can go unnoticed. And I can speak to and command the aid of animals of any sort, in any form. I can help you, Reaper. And if you go without me, I'll know where you've gone, and I'll simply follow.

Lowering his head, he thought to her, Seth will never forgive me if anything happens to you.

She lifted her brows. Seth has no rights here, and no say in the matter.

Reaper met her eyes and nodded once, firmly.

She nodded back, then turned and went to the opposite corner to lie down. But even as she curled up into herself, she glimpsed Jack staring at her.

"What are you up to?" he whispered.

She widened her eyes to their most innocent setting. "Nothing at all. Why do you ask?"

Topaz glanced at her curiously. She was sitting next to Jack, though not close enough to touch. Clearly, she was trying to keep him at arm's length, despite the obvious attraction between them.

Vixen supposed she understood that now.

Jack slid a look toward Reaper, his eyes full of meaning. "No reason."

Vixen lowered her head onto her folded arms, closed her eyes and, without opening them, whispered, "Jack?"

"Yeah?"

"You know that conversation you overheard in Gregor's office? The one where you said he was calling someone sir and asking for triggers?"

"Yeah."

"I don't suppose Gregor keeps any sorts of...pets in his office, does he?"

"Yeah," he said for the third time, "he has a rat."

She blinked her eyes slowly. "I hate rats."

"I know." He paused, then went on. "There's something else in his rooms that you'll want to set free. Check the bigger cage with the sheet over it."

She frowned, but asked no further questions. "Thanks, Jack."

Give him my best, will you? Jack thought.

Who? Vixen asked.

Jack sighed, folded his hands behind his head and lay his head back on them. The rat.

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