I drop to my knees.

“Answer me, please.”

“I’m not sure.”

“It made you hesitate.”

“Yes, but…” I look up at him and find his attention real. He’s concerned that we’ve already come to an impasse. “I’m not sure if it makes me angry.”

“Why do you think I’m talking to you like that?” I don’t know, so I say nothing. “I told you why last night. Think back.”

If I pull your hair, I’m trying to get you off. If I stroke your neck and then palm it with a little bit of pressure, I’m trying to make you come. If I stuff my c**k down your throat and force you to salivate and breathe through it, you should let me do that because I like it.

“You want to excite me, but you want me to be safe while pushing my limits.”

He squats down next to me and cups my face in both hands. “Yes.” He smiles so big I get all tingly from giving him such pleasure. “That’s exactly it.”

Chapter Fifteen

BeggingWillGetYouEverywhere

I JUST stare at her for a few moments as I process what she just said.

Because that’s the closest I’ve ever come to having a sub get it. Most of them say they get it. But when you reach a hard limit, they freak out, or cry, or make you feel guilty for moving forward, even though they did not safe word. I’ve never felt like they really… understood what we were doing. Yes, it’s about sex, but it’s so much more than that. It’s about trust, and pleasing each other.

“I want to please you, Grace. Just as much as you should want to please me. And the ways I please you aren’t always about how big your orgasm is. Sometimes I just want you to…” I stop because I can’t find the right word. “I don’t really know how to say it, but—”

“Accept that you know best?” she asks me, her large eyes turned up at me, so serious, so trusting, so perfect. “And just say yes?”

I nod. “It’s reasonable? To want that? To presume that I’m able to give you that. And to get to that place with hair-pulling and cock-sucking?” We both laugh at that. “It’s stupid. It’s absurd. Hell, I’m not even sure it’s rational.”

“It’s rational, if you look at the right way. I have never swallowed a man’s se**n before. And so it made me stop for a moment. But you explaining all this…” She waves her hand in the air. “It puts it in perspective. Because when you said you wanted to stuff your c**k down my throat, I only felt humiliation and fear. But maybe I will like it? How do I know if I don’t let you—” She swallows hard and shakes her head a little like she’s having a hard time spitting the words out. “Take my choice away and force me to experience it.” She has her eyes closed as the words come out, but then she opens them and I see her trust.

God, that’s something I don’t get often. A woman I just met yesterday is willing to meet me halfway. Is it wrong to accept that trust when I hardly know her? When I know she’s burying secrets that might have long-term consequences?

It feels wrong, but not wrong enough to make me stop.

I reach for her hand and then stand up, placing it over my board shorts where my bulging c**k is stretching the fabric. “Take me out, place my c**k in your mouth, and suck me until I’m ready to come. Then I’ll decide what happens next and you will accept that decision without comment.”

She nods and whispers, “Yes, Master.”

I want to kiss her. I want to pull her up from the ground and kiss her mouth until her lips are swollen and raw. I want to possess her, and f**k her, and own her. I want to show her how perfect she is to me right now. But that would just confuse her, so I wait for her to follow through.

She pulls the fly of my shorts apart with a rip of the Velcro and eases her small hand inside, grabbing hold of my thickness, giving it a slight squeeze—just enough to make me crazy with anticipation—and leans her head in. I shudder when her breath sweeps over my tip and then she places it on her wet tongue. “I never did tell you how I like it, but I don’t think I need to. What you’re doing is perfect.”

She hums out a laugh and it excites me even more. I place my hand on the back of her head and push her forward. She gasps for breath and I ease up and let her take in some air. She does, adjusting to my silent demands. She doesn’t take me deep, she obviously can’t, so I let her do it her way and just enjoy the soft sucking, the lap of her tongue along my shaft when she pulls back, and then the teasing dance her tongue performs on the tip of my cock.

I’ve had girls who can take my c**k all the way to my balls, but Grace’s mouth makes me feel like I’m being worshiped. She wants to please me and I want to please her, so I grab her hair roughly and pull her head back. She gasps, saliva dripping out of her mouth as she looks up at me and waits for my decision.

“Stand up.”

She stands, never taking her eyes off me.

I pull her by the hair and take her over to a tree. She’s holding up her bikini bottoms with her fingertips, desperately trying to keep them from falling. I push her face first into the trunk. “Put your hands above your head and don’t move.” I wish I’d come better prepared—I’d tie her hands to the nearest bough and force her into a new limit. I realize I want to do this so she’ll talk to me about it. So we can discuss how far I can go with the rope. Has conversation always been this erotic to me? Have I ever talked to the subs about it before?