“Ember? What’s up, honey?”

“Just checking that you got Gus’s helmet fixed.” If not, I still had time to pick up a new snap before tonight’s practice.

“All done. We’re heading to the rink after school. Did you want to come watch?”

The rink, where Josh would be. Where I’d have to listen to the Tweedle twins discuss him. Where Mom would think I was watching over her because I couldn’t trust her.

I needed a little distance from Josh to sort myself out, and I needed to trust Mom.

I had to start somewhere.

“Actually, I’m going to get caught up on some homework. Kiss Gus for me, okay?”

I heard her sigh of relief through the phone. “Absolutely. Remember, playoff game is Saturday morning, and you know he’ll be looking for you.”

Yeah, they’d both be looking for me. “No problem, Mom.”

Chapter Fourteen

Snow Bash was the sought-after party invite of February. Sam dressed me in a blue, strapless cocktail dress and pinned my hair up. Friday night came with the agenda of finding a rebound guy.

She handed our invite to the plebe at the door, flashing him a killer smile before yanking me inside. Her sequin-covered dress lit up like a disco ball. We fought our way through the crowd to the bar as memories of Riley bombarded me. He’d loved his stupid frat parties.

A cute blond guy with dimples came over with two red solo cups. “Would you girls like a drink?”

“No thanks. We’re headed to the bar.” I flashed him a smile to take the sting out of my words. I wasn’t rejecting him, just the drinks. No chance in hell was I taking a drink some stranger had poured, or poured something into.

Sam clutched my hand and hauled me toward the bar, weaving in and out of the people both dancing and just hanging out. A DJ was set up in the corner, and Bruno Mars’s “Locked Out of Heaven” blasted on the speakers. Sam squeezed up to the bar, ordered us two Sam Adams, and popped the bottles. “Here’s to rebounds.”

We clinked our bottles, and I took a long pull of the Cherry Wheat. Rebound. The goal tonight was to find a suitable guy. Someone who would take my mind off Dad, and April’s crap, and Mom, and Riley, and . . . and . . . Josh. Yeah, right.

The awesome thing about grief was that it took precedence in my heart, consumed every other pain until I chose to let it in. Dad’s death overshadowed Riley’s betrayal like a broken leg to a stubbed toe.

I just wondered which one would leave harsher scars over the long haul.

“What about him?” Sam pointed to a frat boy with dark brown hair and a nice smile.

“Too short.”

“Okay . . . him?” She gestured toward another guy. Good build, good height.

“No smile.”

She sighed and turned. “Hmm . . . him?” This time it was a blonde. Perfect build, dressed like an Abercrombie model.

My stomach lurched. “Too Riley.”

“Point taken.” We leaned against the bar. Sure, there were a lot of guys girls would drool over. It didn’t take long to peg my problem.

None of these guys were Josh.

A smokin’ hot dirty-blonde, wearing the frat’s polo, tapped his bottle on the mouth of Sam’s, causing beer to spill out everywhere. “Hey!” she shouted, jumping back to keep her shoes from being ruined. “Deacon! Why do you have to be such a jerk?”

He grinned and popped a peanut from a nearby bowl into his mouth. “Sam, you’re looking mighty fine this evening.”

“It’s not going to happen.” I knew that look on her face. She liked him, but not enough to go after him. She smiled as another guy with gorgeous Hispanic features walked over. “Have you guys met Ember?” She tilted her head my way. “Ember, this is Deacon and Mark.”

Mark’s smile was kind and welcoming. “Nice to meet you, Ember.”

Deacon’s green eyes scanned over me. When I thought about choosing someone who wasn’t Josh, a wave of uneasiness churned in my stomach, but I pushed it away. If I was going to hunt for a rebound, someone to lose myself in for a while, then Deacon might fit the bill.

He gave me a slow smile and reached for my hand. I hesitated, but gave it to him. Instead of shaking it, he lifted it to his face, flipped it, and pressed a kiss to my palm. “It’s a delight to meet you . . .” He paused, raking his eyes over me again. “Ember.”

Um. No. The violation of my space by that kiss locked my muscles in revulsion for an instant. I swallowed, willing myself to relax. As soon as my panic wasn’t obvious, I withdrew my hand, forcing the smile to stay on my face. “You, too, Deacon.”

Jagger slid between Deacon and Sam. “Watch out, Deke. Josh has dibs on this one.”

Annoyance itched at me. “Josh does not have dibs on me. We’re not dating.”

Jagger’s eyes narrowed. “You sure about that?”

Was I? We had to be only friends, at least until I wasn’t such a wreck. I’d already made that decision, right? Right. “I’m sure.”

“In that case.” Deacon closed the distance between us and tugged me up against him. “Wanna dance?”

Sam gave me the head-nod urge, and Jagger grimaced, no doubt disappointed in my choice. This was what I was here for, what I’d decided to do. Stick to the rebound plan. “Sure.”

Deacon pulled me onto the floor to something a little dirtier. Rihanna’s “S&M” came over the speakers, and everyone around us got even closer, if that was possible. Deacon crooked his finger at me, and I slid up next to him, ecstatic to lose myself in the beat. Dancing was one area I could let loose.