Like, for instance, the need for blood.

Ever since the attack on Evernight Academy, this Black Cross cell was in lockdown. This meant that we were hiding in one secure location—namely this warehouse, which smelled like old tires and had cots for us to sleep on and oil stains on the concrete floor. People could go outside only if they were patrolling for vampires who might come after us in revenge for the attack on the school. We had to spend virtually every waking second in preparation for battles to come. I’d learned to sharpen knives, for instance, and had the very weird experience of whittling a stake. And now they’d started teaching me how to fight.

Privacy? Forget about it. I was lucky there was a door in front of the toilet. That meant that Lucas and I had almost no chance to be alone—and, even worse, that I hadn’t drunk blood in four days.

Without blood, I became weak. I became hungry. The craving controlled me more and more, and if this went on much longer, I wasn’t sure what I would do.

No matter what, I couldn’t drink blood in front of anybody in Black Cross, save Lucas. When he had seen me bite another vampire during his year at Evernight Academy, I’d thought he would reject me forever; instead, he had overcome his Black Cross indoctrination and remained in love with me. I doubted many other vampire hunters would be capable of the same change of heart. If anyone else in the room with us right now saw me drink blood and realized the truth, I knew exactly what would happen. They would all turn on me in an instant.

Even Dana, one of Lucas’s best friends, who was still cackling about my small victory over Eduardo. Even Kate, who credited me with saving Lucas’s life. Even Raquel, my roommate from school who had joined me in Black Cross. Every time I looked at any of them, I had to remember: They’d kill me if they knew.

“Peanut butter again,” Dana said as a few of us sat on the floor by our cots with our scanty dinner. “You know, seems like I remember enjoying peanut butter, once upon a long ago.”

“Beats noodles with butter,” Lucas said. Dana groaned. In reply to my curious glance, he added, “Last year, for a while, that was pretty much all we could afford. Seriously, every meal for a month, spaghetti noodles with butter. If I never eat that again, it’ll be too soon.”

“Who cares?” Raquel spread peanut butter on her bread like it was caviar. She hadn’t stopped smiling for four days, ever since Black Cross first announced they’d take us in. “So we aren’t dining out at fancy restaurants every night. What does it matter? We’re actually doing something important. Something real.”

I pointed out, “Right now, we’re mostly hiding in a warehouse, eating peanut butter sandwiches without jelly three meals a day.”

That didn’t faze Raquel in the slightest. “It’s just part of the sacrifice we have to make. It’s worth it.”

Dana ruffled Raquel’s short black hair affectionately. “Spoken like a true newbie. We’ll see what you say in year five.” Raquel beamed. She loved the idea of being with Black Cross for five years, for ten, her whole life. After being stalked by vampires at school and haunted by ghosts at home, Raquel wanted nothing more than to kick some supernatural butt. As strange and hungry as the past four days had been, I’d never seen Raquel happier.

“Lights out in one hour!” yelled Kate. “Do what you’ve gotta.”

As one, Dana and Raquel stuffed the last crusts of their sandwiches in their mouths and took off toward the makeshift shower that had been set up in the back. Only the first few people in line would have time to wash tonight, and only one or two would get warm water. Were they planning on fighting each other for a spot in line? The only alternative would probably be to share.

I felt too exhausted to think about taking my clothes off, sweaty though I was. “In the morning,” I said, half to Lucas and half to myself. “I’ll have time to wash in the morning.”

“Hey.” His hand rested on my forearm, comfortingly warm and strong. “You’re trembling.”

“I guess I am.”

Lucas shifted until he sat next to me. His tall frame, well-muscled but wiry, made me feel small and delicate, and his dark gold hair looked brilliant even in these dingy surroundings. His warmth made me imagine that I was in front of a fireplace in winter. As he put one arm around my shoulders, I rested my aching head against him and closed my eyes. That way I could pretend that there weren’t a couple dozen people around us, talking and laughing. That we weren’t in some gray, ugly warehouse that smelled like rubber. That there was nobody in the world but Lucas and me.

Into my ear, he murmured, “I’m worried about you.”

“I’m worried about me, too.”

“Lockdown’s not going to go on much longer. Then we can get you some—something to eat, I mean—and you and I can figure out what to do next.”

I understood what he meant. We were going to run away, the way we’d planned before the attack on Evernight. Lucas wanted to get away from Black Cross almost as badly as I did. But in order to do that, we’d need money, our freedom, and a chance to make plans together in private. Right now, all we could do was hang on.

When I looked at Lucas, I saw the concern in his dark green eyes. I put my hand to his cheek and felt the rough scrub of beard stubble. “We’ll make it. I know we will.”

“I’m supposed to be the one taking care of you.” He kept studying me, as if he could somehow find the answer to our problems in my face. “Not the other way around.”