Dane had a very unusually serious look on his face when he got into my car. Maybe I wasn’t the only one nervous about tonight. I wondered if me meeting his mom was as frightening for him as him meeting mine was to me. He seemed nervous and fidgety as we made our way to his mom’s apartment.

“Will Nolan be there tonight?” I asked, trying to ease the tension in the car.

“Who knows. I guess we’ll find out when we get there,” he said, biting his thumbnail.

“Hey, are you okay?”

He dropped his hands back into his lap. “Yeah, just a little nervous, I guess. You’re the first girl I’ve ever brought home.” My stomach fluttered; I liked hearing those words. There were some firsts I could still have with Dane.

“It’ll be fine. I’m sure I’ll love your mom.” I glanced over at him and watched for a second as he worked his bottom lip between his teeth. I wished I wasn’t driving so I could lean over and kiss him. He looked good, even when he was nervous.

“It’s not you I’m worried about.” He turned his attention to the window as we drove the rest of the way in silence. I wondered what he was talking about, but I didn’t ask. His body language told me he didn’t want to talk about it.

His mother lived in a rough part of the city. Dane had mentioned that she struggled with minimum wage jobs and didn’t have a lot of money. She lived in an old brick building with a torn canopy and barred windows. A few of the railings around the fire escape were covered with clothes and blankets left out to dry. There were two kids playing on the front step and I pictured a young Dane sitting there. “Is this where you grew up?”

“After my dad left, yeah. I know it’s not much, but-”

“Dane, stop. It doesn’t matter what the building looks like. We’re here so I can meet your family.” I placed my hand on top of his. He was worrying too much and I had to calm him down.

He closed his eyes and took a cleansing breath. “Let’s do this.” I cupped his face in my hands and pressed light kisses on his forehead, cheeks and finally along his jaw line in an attempt to wipe away his worries.

He grasped my hand tightly in his as we made our way into the building. The walls were yellow and the tan carpet had seen better days, but it was clean. I noticed an overwhelming mixture of smells, like each renter was cooking a different item for dinner and their scents had married in the hallway. It reminded me of a mall food court.

His mom’s apartment was on the second floor, all the way down the hall to the right. He turned to me with fire in his eyes; something was still bothering him. “Look, if my brother is here don’t let him get to you, please.” I wanted to ask for more information, but he knocked on the door instead, halting my question. My hand was sweating as I waited for the door to open. I didn’t know what to expect, but the woman standing on the other side of the door was short, maybe five foot two, with a thin figure and long blond hair. It was easy to see she had once been beautiful, but stress and alcohol must have done a number on her.

She held her hand out to me. “Nice to meet you,” she said. I recognized her eyes; they were the same exact green color as Dane’s. There was no denying they were related.

“Nice to meet you, too,” I said as I shook her hand.

“Call me Janet. And you are?”

“Alex,” I said, pulling my hand back.

Dane gave his mom a quick kiss on the cheek, never letting go of my hand. “Hi, Mom.”

“How have you been?” she asked, her eyebrows squeezing together.

“Same as last week. Everything is going well at school and in life,” he said, looking down at me as he finished the last part. I could feel my face heating up.

“Good. Come in. Make yourselves comfortable.” She stared at us, rubbing her hand over her collarbone, as we made our way into the living area. She seemed nervous or distant; I couldn’t quite put my finger on it.

“Your brother will be here shortly.” I heard Dane scoff before sitting down on the sofa, pulling me with him. “I’m going to get supper ready,” she said, disappearing into the kitchen.

I glanced around the apartment, noting it had the same worn carpet as the hallways, but with white walls. The furniture was older, but well maintained. There were several photos of small children on the wall, but no recent photos of Dane or his brother. “Is that you?” I asked, pointing to a picture of three little kids. The boys were almost identical, but the little girl had short curly blond hair and big blue eyes.

“Yeah, I was eight, Nolan was five, and my sister was four. That is actually the last picture of us together before the accident. After my sister died and my dad left no one took pictures anymore.” His voice was full of sadness, especially when he mentioned his sister. My heart clenched as I reached up to squeeze his shoulder.

“She was adorable,” I whispered.

“Dinner’s ready!” his mom yelled from the kitchen. I looked up at Dane who had unshed tears in his eyes. He simply nodded before he stood, pulling me up with him. I wished we had more time to talk. He seemed to hold so much inside and I wanted to break in and take it all out to ease his pain.

His mood shifted as we sat down at the small round table in the kitchen. Dane was just as good of an actor as I was; I had to give him that. His mom sat at one end of the table while Dane and I took seats across from each other. He winked at me, leaning in to help his mom cut the pot roast. My mouth watered as I eyed all the delicious foods that I didn’t usually eat. There was roast, potatoes, carrots, corn, rolls and a layered chocolate cake. Maybe I shouldn’t have worn jeans.

“Well, dig in. I can’t eat all this myself,” his mom said as she spooned potatoes on her plate. I took just a little bit of everything in an attempt to save room for cake. Dane had mentioned his mom took up baking after she went through recovery. It was something to keep her busy when she got a craving.

I was about to take my first bite when the door slammed in the other room, startling all of us. I noticed Dane and his mom both seemed tense while staring at the doorway. I assumed that Nolan was about to join us and their reaction was making me nervous. What was it about him that made them react this way? A few seconds later, a man who looked just like Dane came into the kitchen. He was a little taller and his light brown hair was longer, but they had identical eyes and lips. He didn’t say anything as he sat down and filled his plate until there wasn’t room for anything else. I looked around the table and noticed I wasn’t the only one staring.

“What are you fuckers looking at?” he asked, looking up from his plate. “And who is this sexy bitch?” he added, staring at me with his mouth turned up on one side.

Dane shot out of his chair, grabbing Nolan by the shirt until their faces were inches apart. “Don’t you ever call her that again. Do you hear me?” I could see the veins in Danes neck and every bit of exposed skin had turned beet red.

Nolan didn’t seem the least bit intimidated. “Chill, dude. I’m just trying to have a friendly conversation.” I looked over at Dane’s mom who wasn’t looking at her boys, but instead running her fork through her potatoes over and over while using her other hand to rub her collarbone.

“I mean it, Nolan, don’t f**king talk about her like that,” Dane said, letting go of his shirt.

Nolan didn’t waste any time before returning his attention back to me. “Does he treat you like that?”

“No one gets treated like you Nolan because no one acts like you,” Dane answered for me.

Nolan laughed. “Yeah, I bet you are nice to her as long as she’s warming your dick every night.”

“Nolan, stop!” Dane yelled, slamming his fist on the table. It was quiet for a couple minutes while everyone picked through their food. I didn’t have much of an appetite anymore, but I managed a few bites of vegetables, never taking my eyes off my plate. This whole dinner had left me feeling uncomfortable. It was easy to see why Dane was so nervous on the ride over.

“Nolan, I’m glad you came tonight. How are things going?” Janet asked, smiling at her youngest son. He had been nothing but rude since he walked in, but his mother acted like she hadn’t heard a thing.

“I’ve got a f**king mess. I’m short on rent this month and if I don’t come up with $100 by the end of this week, I’m out. Can I borrow some money? I’ll pay you back as soon as I get paid,” Nolan said, pleading with his eyes as he stared at his mother.

“Sure, Baby, I’ll give you some before you leave.”

“Don’t give him a f**king penny!” Dane yelled, interrupting their conversation. “He is just going to turn around and buy drugs. How can he pay you back when he doesn’t have a job?”

This whole conversation was getting to be too much. All they were doing was yelling and arguing and I needed a moment to collect my thoughts. My family dinners were always focused on accomplishments and goals; I loathed them for years, but now that I’d seen this I kind of missed them.

“Where is the bathroom?” I asked. I wasn’t even sure they remembered I was sitting there during this whole exchange.

“Go through the living room and down the hall to the left, sweetie,” Janet offered.

Dane quickly stood up, but I motioned for him to stay. It looked like they needed some family time without me. My legs were shaking as I made my way toward the bathroom. I’d never felt more out of my element, but I needed to do this for Dane. The problem was, it didn’t seem like his element either. The bathroom was small with a pink toilet and bathtub and an old, gold and white marbled sink. I sat on the edge of the tub, putting my head in my hands; I wanted to leave, but I couldn’t do that to Dane. He had given me so much over the last few weeks and it was my chance to return the favor.

After a few minutes and many deep breaths, I made my way out of the bathroom. As soon as I walked into the kitchen, Dane stood up, “Are you okay?” His face showed concern and I wondered if he said anything to Nolan while I was in the bathroom. Nolan’s demeanor hadn’t changed as he sat back in his chair with his arm resting over the top. Janet sat in her seat, smiling up at me like this was some sort of pleasant experience.