He motions for me to follow him to his room. He closes the door, and I sit on the edge of his bed. He takes the chair across from me and glares at me. “Spill it,” he bites out.
Paul signs and talks at the same time, so I do, too. “Something is wrong with Em,” I say.
His brow furrows. “What kind of wrong?”
I get up, suddenly feeling like I have ants in my pants. I walk over to his dresser and run my finger down a picture of our mother that’s in a gold frame. It’s rough and bumpy, but her face is smooth when I touch the glass. Paul taps my shoulder so I turn to face him.
“You’re really worrying me. What’s wrong?”
“When Kelly was pregnant,” I start. I swallow hard, because I need to in order to get past the lump in my throat. “When Kelly was pregnant,” I say again. “What was she like?”
I watch his hands, afraid to look into his face because I might accidentally look into his eyes.
“Is Emily pregnant?” he asks. His hands are flying furiously all of a sudden. “What the f**k, Logan?” he says. “What did I tell you about using condoms? I told you that her being on the pill wasn’t enough.”
“I don’t know if she is or not,” I rush to say. “I just don’t know what to say or do, and you were the only one I wanted to talk to.” I slap my palm down on the dresser, because he looks like his hands are gearing up to continue to chastise me. “I need you to listen,” I say.
He freezes and runs a hand through his hair. “Okay,” he says. His hands are softer now, though. “Okay,” he says again. “I’m listening.”
“She hasn’t had her period,” I say.
“How do you know?” he asks.
I throw my hands up. “How do you think I know?” That was the dumbest question ever.
His chest bellows with air like he’s heaving a sigh. “I know you’re having sex. But sometimes a few days go by…” He lets the words trail off.
“A few days never go by,” I say. I feel heat creep up my cheeks.
“You do it every day?” he asks, his brows arching.
I won’t answer that. I just raise my brows. I am inside her pretty much every f**king day. I can’t do without her.
“Okay,” he says. “So, no period.”
“She’s waking up sick, some.”
“Okay,” he says, making a motion for me to continue.
“And her boobs are getting bigger.” I make a motion like I’m grabbing her boobs and squeezing them.
“Logan,” he says. “Seriously?” But he’s grinning. He shakes his head and I can’t keep from grinning too.
“They’re mine. I can play with them all I want.” I laugh at the look on his face.
“Did she take a test yet?”
I shake my head. “I’m not sure she knows yet.”
“Why the f**k are you here talking to me instead of to her?” He looks at me. Paul has this way of really looking at people. Like he’s sees all of you. But he never talks about what he sees.
“I’m not sure she wants kids,” I admit.
He slaps his hands together. “Then you should have used a f**king condom.”
I run my hands through my hair and jerk through the ends. “You don’t understand,” I say. I start for the door. He grabs my shoulder and turns me around.
“Explain it,” he says. “I’m listening.”
“Em is scared of being a mom,” I tell him. I hate talking about her dyslexia when she’s not in the room.
“I’ve seen her with Hayley. No one I know would be a better mother.”
My heart warms that he feels that way. I do, too.
“It sounds to me like you need to do two things,” he says.
This is why I came to Paul. He always knows what to do. I motion for him to continue.
He holds up one finger. “One: you need to get her a f**king test.”
And? I ask.
“Two: you need to reassure her.” He sits down. “You know she’s afraid. It’s your job to support her through it. Whatever she needs, you offer it.”
“But I don’t know what she needs!” I cry.
“She needs you, dumbass.” He smiles. “You’re all she’s ever needed. When I see the two of you together and how happy you are, sometimes it makes my f**king gut twist with jealousy, do you know that?”
I didn’t. I had no idea.
“From the moment you met her, you knew she was the one. And she felt the same way. You two were made for one another. So, go to her and be what she needs. Just be you. You’re all she’s ever needed, you f**kwad.”
He’s right. We can do anything together. “I need to go see Emily.”
He claps his hand on my shoulder. “Buy a test on the way home,” he says. “Then text me and tell me how it goes.”
I nod and pull him in for a hug. He looks startled, but he falls against me and pulls me close. When he lets me go, I reach for the doorknob. He stops me.
“You’re feeling hopeful, right?” he asks.
I nod, and a grin tugs at my lips. “I’ll be the happiest man in the world if she’s pregnant.”
“You’re one lucky son of a bitch.” He grins, though and signs, Good luck.
Thanks, I sign back. Text you later.
I let myself out, only stopping for a minute to talk to Sam and Pete. I stop and buy a pregnancy test kit at the pharmacy and go home, hoping Em will be there.