"You, help shopping?"

"I want to come help my best friend. Can't I do that?"

"You just want to be an ass." She groaned.

"No I don't. Let me come."

"Don't you have to work?"

"That's the great thing about being the boss’s son. I can take off when there's an emergency."

"There is no emergency."

"I'm coming, Clementine."

"Oh, thank you, Mr. Madison!" she exclaimed in a sing-song voice. "I'm so thankful for your help."

"As you should be." I laughed. "And who knows, maybe I'll take you to dinner tomorrow night."

"I told you, I have a date."

"Well, maybe you'll come to your senses."

"I'm allowed to date, Rhett."

"I know that, but a loser you met online?" I made a face. "Does Nanna know?"

"Of course not," she sighed. "No one in my family knows."

"Okay." I said simply. Nanna was Clementine’s grandma, but we both called her Nanna. She felt like my real grandma and had always treated me as her grandson since I had met her as a little kid.

"By the way, Nanna asked me if you can come to the family BBQ in two weeks."

"Well, duh," I laughed.

"She also said to tell you that you can bring your girlfriend."

"What girlfriend?" I groaned. "Clemmie, you know that I don't do girlfriends. I don't want a relationship."

"Don't you ever want to get married or have kids?"

"Kids, ugh. And marriage? Why?"

"For true love? For companionship?"

"I don't believe in true love and I have you for companionship."

"But what about the other stuff?" Her voice sounded embarrassed.

"You mean sex?" I laughed and adjusted myself. "Are we going to talk about sex now?" My voice was light, but I was uncomfortable. Part of me wanted to tell her what had happened this morning, but I knew that there was no way she’d understand. I didn’t even understand.

"Whatever, Rhett." She sighed. "Have sex with nameless women and just continue being a player."

"Thank you, I will." I snapped back at her.

"Why did you call me, Rhett?" She sounded annoyed.

"I wanted to talk. Or is that a no-no now you're dating online?"

"It's midnight."

"Would you rather I say this is a booty call?" I asked, half-joking.

"Rhett!"

"What?" I laughed.

"I'm going to bed now."

"No phone sex?"

"You're gross."

"I'm touching myself now." I muttered into the phone, while I adjusted myself.

"Rhett!" She gasped. "I'm warning you."

"I'm joking," I laughed. "I'll see you tomorrow."

"Fine. Bye," she hung up and I closed my eyes. My hands reached into my boxers and I started jerking off. I imagined myself in a dark club f**king some nameless girl on the dance floor. I could feel myself growing harder and harder and as I came Clementine’s face popped into my head. I grabbed the small towel at the side of the bed and cleaned up. I lay back down and frowned. I didn’t want to think about picturing Clementine as the girl at the club. I needed to think about something else. I sighed as I thought about her going on a date. I was worried about Clementine. She was too nice a girl to be dating online. Those guys were going to eat her alive. I was going to have to make sure that she wasn't taken advantage of. I was just going to have to figure out how.

***

I woke up the next morning feeling annoyed and I didn't know why. I jumped in the shower and then headed out to pick Clementine up. I honked on the horn instead of getting out and going to the door, and waited.

"What the fuck!" I grumbled to myself as I realized I'd been waiting at least fifteen minutes. I pressed my hand against the steering wheel and honked again.

My phone beeped and I saw a text from Clementine. “Yes, Rhett?”

"If you know I'm outside, why don't you hurry your ass up?"

"I'm waiting for you to come to my door like a gentleman," she texted back and I glared at the phone. I swore she thought we lived back in the fifties and hadn't gotten the note that men didn't have to woo women anymore. Especially not guys like me.

"Do you really expect me to come to the door?"

"If this was a date, wouldn't you be on your best behavior?" She was right, of course. Both of us had gone to etiquette and then cotillion classes. We knew what was expected of fine young southerners, but I just wasn't in the mood.

"This isn't a date."

"I'll be waiting inside until you show your manners," she replied, and I could see the smug smile on her face in my head. Clementine O’Hara was loving every second of this conversation.

"I swear I'm going to drop that girl and get a new best friend," I sighed as I stepped out of my black Mustang.

"Clementine!" I shouted as I knocked on the front door.

"Oh, hi, Rhett." She opened the door slowly and grinned at me. "Imagine seeing you here."

"I've been waiting in the car for the last 30 minutes." I glared at her and she laughed.

"Don't exaggerate." She walked out of the door. "Let's go eat. I'm starved."

"What about your whole weight-loss thing to impress this guy?" I looked at her for a few seconds as we walked if the car. "I thought you didn't wanna go on your date looking like a fatass."

"Are you saying that breakfast is going to make me a fatass?" She paused and looked at me.

"If you're going to get pancakes, eggs, bacon, sausage, toast, and hashbrowns like you normally do, then yes." I winked at her and she laughed.

"You're so rude, Rhett."

"That's why I don't have a girlfriend." I grinned as we got into the car.

"Yeah, that's why." She poked me in the ribs. "You're not all skin and bones yourself."

"Hey, we can be fatties together."

"You're a jerk." She turned away from me and looked out of the window.

"You're not seriously mad at me, are you?" I sighed as I stared at the side of her face. "I was just joking."

"Uh huh," she retorted and I froze, not sure what to say. Clementine was so sensitive these days. It was like she had lost her sense of humor about certain things.

"I don't really think you're a fatass, Clemmie."

"Uh huh." She still didn't look at me.

"I was just joking about the amount of food you eat." I reached out and touched her shoulder. "Don't be mad."

"I'm so angry." She started and then looked at me with twitching lips. "I'm going to..." She started again but started giggling.

"What?" I frowned as I watched her laughing.

"Gotcha." She made a face at me and continued laughing.

"Don't do that, Clemmie." I groaned. "I thought you were seriously upset."

"That's what you get for being an asshole."

"Hey, I don't mind that you've got a little extra weight." I winked at her. "And neither will other guys. It's just more cushion for the pushing."

"Rhett." She shook her head as she buckled her seatbelt. "You're gross."

"I'm a man, baby. Trust me. A little extra meat is much better than skin and bones."

"So why are all your dates’ skinny as models?" She pursed her lips at me.

"No, they're not."

"Yes they are. I haven't seen an extra inch on any of them."

"Well maybe that's why it's never worked out before. I need to find me a big-boned lady." I laughed at Clementine’s expression.

"Now I'm big-boned," she shook her head and rolled her eyes as I started the engine.

"You're perfect." I looked over and her and spoke honestly. "You don't need to change a thing."

"Uh huh." She turned on the radio. "You're such a liar."

"There is nothing I’d change about you." I spoke softly and I knew she didn't believe me, but my words were completely true. Clementine was my best friend and I wouldn't change a thing about her.

"Let's just talk about something else." She rolled her eyes and I knew she was a bit peeved.

"You're not seriously mad, are you?"

"When do I ever stay mad at you, Rhett Madison?" She raised an eyebrow at me. "No matter how obnoxious you get, I always forgive you."

"Obnoxious? Me?" I joked and we both laughed. "So tell me about this mystery guy."

"I'll show you his profile." She exclaimed excited. "Well, maybe I'll show you when we get to the restaurant." She laughed.

"Okay..." I paused and have her a quick look. "So his name is? How old is he? Etc.?"

"His name is Elliott and he's the same age as us."

"So he's 21."

"That's the same age we were the last time I checked."

"What is he, some kind of loser?" I made a face. "Why is a 21-year-old guy looking for a girl online?"

"I guess he's a loser like me, then," she said tartly, and I felt my face growing warm. I'd putmy foot in it again.

"My bad, Clemmie. That's not what I meant." I made a face. "So tell me more about this idiot."

"His name is Elliott, Rhett."

"Yeah, yeah."

"He likes to bird watch."

"Boring." I yawned.

"It could be fun." She came to his defense. "Plus that means he likes nature and silence."

"Clementine, you chat a mile a minute and you're not really a nature girl."

"I like camping," she protested.

"Clemmie, the last time we went camping with Jake, you complained the whole time about bugs and being scared a bear was going to come get us."

"I was just joking." She made a face at me. "Anyway, I can grow to love it."

"So tell me more about Mr. Country."

"He's not Mr. Country, city-slicker Rhett." She groaned.

"He lives in South Carolina and likes to bird watch. Trust me, he's country. Does he catch gators too?" I looked at her face flashing red and started laughing. "Oh my god, he does, doesn't he? He catches gators too. Does he ride?"

"We ride, Rhett." She glared at me. "And the last thing I knew we both live in South Carolina as well. In fact, I kinda remember seeing some cowboy boots in your closet and a big ol’ pickup in your garage."

"That's cool country." I shrugged. "He's hick country."

"You're a snob."

"I'm just being honest." I licked my lips as we pulled into the Cracker Barrel parking lot. "Someone needs to ask you the hard-hitting questions."

"You haven't asked me any hard hitting questions. You asked some basic questions, made some assumptions and you sound like a jackass."

"Okay, I guess you'd rather sit in silence and wait for the bears to approach you and live in a trailer."

"Elliott doesn't live in a trailer." She paused as we got out of the car. "He's actually from Philadelphia. He came down here for school and lives on campus."

"Whoa, and big boy can't find a girl on campus." I gave her my shocked look. "What a loser."

"Rhett, you're an asshole."

"I'm just looking out for you. I don't want you dating a serial killer. You know Ted Bundy was up in Gainesville killing all those girls."

"I think I’m fine."

"Do you want me to come with you?" I grinned. "I can go to the restaurant and sit at another table and look all incognito and shit. I'll wear my Ray Bans and John Deere cap, to cover up my face."

"No thanks. And why would you need a disguise? He doesn't know what you look like."

"Maybe he Facebook stalked me."

"Why would he do that?"

"When you told him about me, maybe he was curious as to what I looked like, so he Facebook stalked me."

"Rhett, he has no idea who you are." She laughed. "I haven't mentioned you."

"What?" I frowned as we sat down. "How is that possible?"

"Why would you come up?" She gave me a weird look.

"When he asked you about your friends or your best friend." I paused.

"He didn't ask me about my friends and I didn't bring you up. So don't worry, he hasn't Facebook stalked you."

"Well, you better mention me soon." I opened the menu and looked at my options for breakfast. I was starting to feel aggravated inside and I didn't know why. I wanted to tell Clementine to cancel her date with Elliott. He sounded like a loser and I didn't think she should even waste her time with him, but what did I know? I looked up and stared at Clementine as she studied the menu and made the small little noises she always made when deciding what to eat. I smiled to myself as her eyes studied each item carefully.

"What are you having?" I asked her after a minute.

"No idea." She groaned. "I don't know if I should get breakfast or lunch,"