Alexa scoffed, “The girls to graduate high school.”

“Stop it.” I narrowed my eyes at her. “I’m going to tell him. I feel absolutely awful about it, but he’s had so much going on lately, I don’t want to stress him out any more.”

The waitress brought over spinach-avocado dip, which they must have ordered before I got there. Lauren smiled as she walked away and popped a chip in her mouth. “What’s going on with him?”

I finally took my hoodie off and put it on the back of my chair. “Well, his contract is up this season, so the pressure is on to play well. Obviously if he knew this was going on, it would mess with his head. Also, his mom just had her scans and they haven’t gotten the results yet. He hasn’t said it out loud, but I know he’s freaked out about it.”

“That’s understandable.” She took another bite and reached over, smacking Alexa’s arm. “Cut her some slack, Lex.”

“I understand that he’s got a lot going on. I even think it’s slightly adorable that Kacie loves him so much, she doesn’t want to make it worse.” She sighed. “I’m just worried. I don’t see this ending well.”

“It’ll be fine.” Lauren waved Alexa off. “These two are so crazy in love with each other, Brody will totally understand why she waited. And then they’ll ride off into the sunset on a Zamboni.”

“Yeah, well hopefully Kacie is on that Zamboni with Brody instead of sitting in the penalty box, crying.”

My stomach hurt and Alexa’s jokes about Brody leaving me were not helping. I wasn’t lying when I said I felt awful about not telling him. I felt beyond awful, but I really didn’t want to stress him out.

“Stop it!” Lauren slugged Alexa in the arm again.

“Listen,” Alexa warned her, “if you don’t stop hitting me, I’m going to hit you back—pregnant or not.”

Wait, what?

“What?” I exclaimed.

Lauren shrugged and grinned at me. “Surprise!”

“Oh my God, Lauren! How could you not tell me?” I jumped up and rushed to her side of the table to hug her again. “Congratulations!”

“How could she not tell you? That’s a good question coming from you, huh?” Alexa teased sarcastically.

“Listen.” I spun toward her, unable to hold my frustration in anymore. “I get that you don’t agree with the way I’ve handled this situation, but seriously… kiss my ass.” Tears welled up in my eyes and my voice started cracking, but I didn’t care. “You have no idea what I’ve been going through. None. Zach walked out all those years ago and I never expected to see him again—ever. Then on my first day of work, boom! There he was, in my face. Things with Brody had just started getting serious and selfishly, I didn’t want to mess anything up. Hell, I didn’t even know if it was worth it to say anything because I had no idea if I’d ever see Zach again after that day.” Lauren reached for my hand and squeezed it, but I didn’t stop. “I have two kids, I’m trying to finish my degree and keep my still new relationship alive, all while juggling this huge pimple on the face of my past that is my ex. Stop looking down your nose at me, damn it! You have no idea how hard this has been for me.” At that point, tears were spilling out of my eyes and people were staring.

Alexa’s cheeks flushed as she sat frozen, staring at me with her mouth open. She blinked a few times and shook her head back and forth slowly. “Kacie, I am so sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you.”

“Just… forget it.” I wiped my cheeks with the back of my hands and bent down and hugged Lauren. “I’m sorry, Lauren, but I have to go. I’m beyond exhausted and need a break. Call me tomorrow. Maybe we can have lunch before you leave?”

Lauren stood up and hugged me so tight, I almost started sobbing right there in her arms, but I just needed to keep it together long enough to get to my car. “It’s okay, Kacie. I understand.”

I pulled back and cupped my friend’s face. “I really am so happy for you. You’re going to be a great mom. Tell Tommy I said congrats.”

I grabbed my hoodie and left without saying good-bye to Alexa. By the time I got to my car, I was in a full-on sob. It felt good and awful at the same time.

“Hello?”

“Hey, Son.”

“Dad?” My dad never called me. I hardly recognized his voice. “What’s up?”

“Nothing. Just wanted to call my champ and say hi.”

Champ? He hasn’t called me that in years.

Instantly I was ten years old again…

“Hey, Champ. I can’t make your tournament this weekend, but good luck.”

“Heard you played great tonight, Champ. Sorry I missed it.”

When it came to my father, calling me Champ was a way to soften whatever blow was coming.

“Hi,” I said cautiously. “Everything okay?”

“Everything is great. What are your plans this coming weekend?”

“Uh, we’re home this weekend. I have a game Friday, but then just practice Saturday morning. Probably heading to Kacie’s after. Why?”

He hesitated. “Saturday after practice, can you head up here for awhile before you go to her house?”

I didn’t like the tone in his voice. Not even a little.

“Dad, what’s going on?”

“Nothing. Mom and I just have a few things to talk about with you and Shae.”

Dad, Mom, me, and Shae? SHIT! Her scans were a couple weeks ago.

No, no, no, no.

“Dad, is this about mom’s scans?”

“No. Mom is okay, we just need to talk to you guys.” He sounded tired.

Exhausted. Stressed.

“Fuck that, Dad. I’m coming now.”

“Brody, that’s not necess—”

I hung up on him, grabbed Diesel’s leash, and out the door we went.

I wouldn’t say I had an out-of-body experience, but when I pulled onto the long dirt driveway at my parents’ farm, I didn’t remember any of the drive from my house to theirs. My heart raced the whole way there with the worst scenarios playing over and over in my head. If her cancer was back again, I would not break down at their house. I would remain strong. She beat it once, she could do it again. We would do it together. What if Dad was sick this time? Fuck. He’s her rock. Should I retire early? It’s not like I couldn’t afford it, but could I live without hockey?

I marched up to the house and through the front door as Diesel sprinted around back to find something to play with.

Closing the front door quietly, I listened for voices or crying. Nada. That was good, right?

“Brody?” Mom called out as I walked into the kitchen. She came right over and embraced me. “You didn’t have to come up here tonight.”

“Dad never calls me. What’s going on?”

Mom’s eyes shifted over to my dad who was sitting at the kitchen table, looking ten years older than he did the last time I saw him. He was staring down at the large oak table, picking at the fingernails on his weathered hands.

“Come. Sit down.” She went over and pulled a chair out for me.

I groaned and stubbornly followed my mom over to the table, sitting across from my dad.