“I don’t give a shit about the pictures,” he says.

“And you shouldn’t. The only thing you should care about today is the person coming down that aisle.”

He sighs. He sighs big. Then he takes another drink.

“You do care about the person coming down the aisle, don’t you?” I ask.

I can’t help but wonder, as I have a thousand times in the past few weeks, if this is really what he wants.

“Of course I do. Brooke is a great girl.”

“Yes, she is. And she deserves someone who loves her more than anything.”

“Yes. She does.”

“Are you that person, Bass? Because if you’re not …”

The door opens and Sawyer walks through. “Can I come in?”

Bass waves him over.

“How’s it going in here?” he asks.

“Just the usual case of cold feet,” Bass says, jokingly.

And, again, I wonder.

“Is that really a thing?” Sawyer asks. “Like, do all grooms want to bolt right before they get hitched?”

“I think you’ve both seen too many movies,” I say.

“Where is everyone else?” Sawyer asks.

“Who do you mean?”

“You know, the groomsmen or ushers or whatever.”

I shake my head. “There is no one else. Just me. And Brooke’s best friend, Jordan.”

“But there must be hundreds of people out there,” Sawyer says.

“That doesn’t mean you have to have more attendants,” I explain to him. “You don’t know much about weddings, do you?”

“Don’t care to,” he says. “I’ve only been to two of them, and both times I was wasted. Weddings and funerals – so not my thing.”

And in true Sawyer Mills style, he chips away another piece of my heart.

This man is truly incapable of love, despite the fact that I’m sure he loves me. I once read that insanity is doing something over and over again even though you get the same undesired results. That pretty much sums up my entire life right now. Sawyer won’t change. I can’t change him. I’ve tried. And I’m crazy to think I can.

Then again, he’s here. At a wedding. Because I asked him to be. Even though he hates them.

I look at the clock. “It’s almost time,” I say, straightening Bass’s tie.

“My cue to leave. I’ll see you out there, man. Break a leg,” Sawyer says to Bass. “And good luck to the hottest ‘best man’ I’ve ever seen.”

When Sawyer walks out the door, Bass’s parents come in to wish him luck. His dad shakes his hand and gives him some fatherly advice. His mom looks at me with such sad eyes, I want to scream at her. Then again, she may be the only sane person in this room. And part of me wishes she would have the guts to tell Bass to walk away. Because he should. He should walk away before someone gets hurt.

I laugh at myself when I realize if there were anyone ever in greater need of walking away from something, it’s me. Because every day I stay hurts a little bit more.

The minister pokes his head in the door and tells us it’s time for us to take our places in the front of the church, right before the family gets escorted to their seats.

“Ready?” I ask, hoping beyond all hope that he reads my eyes that are begging him to turn and walk out the door. The back door.

“Ready,” he says, holding out his arm, motioning for me to go first.

I paste a smile on my face as I walk through the door at the very front of the church. I eye the hundreds of people in attendance as I take my place by the altar. I scan the crowd and find Sawyer, thinking of how much I want this with him but can never have it. And I swear he looks at me, knowing it. Knowing he can never be the one to give it to me.

Bass walks in behind me, taking his place front and center, next to the minister. He looks at me nervously and I give him an encouraging nod. Because it’s too late to back out now. He’s committed to this. I just hope he’s not making a huge mistake. I hope that even if he isn’t in love with Brooke now, he can learn to be.

People can learn to do a lot of things. And if Bass can learn to love Brooke, maybe I can learn not to love Sawyer.

Music begins to play and Bass’s grandmother is escorted down the aisle, his grandfather following. Then his other grandmother, the widowed one, is escorted as well. Bass’s parents are next, filling up the front right pew.

After that, Brooke’s two sets of grandparents are escorted in. Her mother should come next. But she doesn’t. The song ends and there is a brief silence. Then the song starts up again and we all look to see if Brooke’s mom is being escorted down the aisle. She’s not.

When the song comes to an end for the second time, the whispers among guests become louder. Bass turns to look at me and I shrug my shoulders. Has something happened to Brooke’s mother? To Brooke?

The room is abuzz when the side door opens and Brooke’s father comes through, motioning for Bass to follow him back into the room from where we came.

Bass grabs my arm, pulling me along with him. Brooke’s father takes a long look at me and then shuts the door behind us, separating us from the sanctuary.

“Sit down, son,” John says, motioning to the couch.

Bass gives me a curious look and then he takes a seat. I remain standing. I feel like an intruder. John is looking at me like I’m an intruder. But Bass’s eyes implore me to stay, so intruder or not, I’m staying.

John puts a hand on Bass’s shoulder. “I’m sorry. Brooke has changed her mind. There isn’t going to be a wedding today.”

“Changed her mind?” Bass asks. “What do you mean there won’t be a wedding today?”

“There won’t be a wedding at all,” he clarifies.

“Sir?” Bass says, confused.

“I’m sorry, this is awkward,” John says, looking at me again. “Brooke feels she isn’t the woman for you. She’s coming back to live with us for a while. You can stay in the apartment. We’ll arrange for her things to be picked up in a day or two.”

“So she’s just … gone?” Bass asks.

John pulls an envelope out of his suit pocket, handing it to Bass. “She left this for you. It’ll explain things better than I can.” He heads for the door but then turns around. He nods to the envelope in Bass’s hand. “Along with Brooke’s letter, I’ve written down the information you’ll need to go to Hawaii as you had planned. There’s an extra ticket now. You can take whomever you want.”

“John, I couldn’t,” Bass says.

“You can,” John says. “Even if she isn’t the one for you, Brooke is still at fault here. I’m truly sorry she didn’t come to this decision earlier. Take the tickets. Enjoy Hawaii. Think about what you want out of life. Good luck, son.”

He walks out the door, leaving us stunned and speechless.

Bass opens the envelope and pulls out the letter. I read it over his shoulder. She’s not mad at him. She’s mad at herself for not ending things earlier. She’s not willing to be anyone’s second choice. My name comes up more than once, making it clear that I’m the reason this wedding is not happening.

He folds the letter up and puts it away. “Want to go to Hawaii with me in six months?”

I want to go to Hawaii more than anything. The problem is, the man sitting on the couch is not the man I want to go with.

I point to the letter. “Based on what’s written in that letter, I’m not sure that’s a good idea.”

He nods sadly. “Yeah, I guess not.”

“I’m sorry,” I tell him.

“Are you?” he asks. “You never wanted me to marry her.”

“Only because I know you don’t love her. Not that way. Not the way you should when you make a life-long commitment. But I’m still sorry. I know you care about her.”

“I do,” he says. “But part of me is relieved.”

“So, what now?” I ask.

“Now I go out and get shit-faced. Isn’t that what everyone who gets left at the altar does?”

“Where to?” I ask. “I’ll take you anywhere you want to go.”

He laughs, but it’s not a happy laugh, it’s a pained one. He runs a finger along the edge of the envelope. Then he throws my words back at me. “Based on what’s written in this letter, I’m not sure that’s a good idea.”

We lock eyes and I see it. I see something change within him. He needs distance. Distance from me. Because the only way to truly get over someone is by getting away from them.

There’s a knock on the door and then Sawyer sticks his head inside. “Is the coast clear?” he asks.

“Come in,” I tell him. “There isn’t going to be a wedding.”

“I know. Brooke’s dad just told everyone.” Sawyer walks over to Bass. “You okay, Briggs? Your parents are waiting outside the door. They thought you might need a minute with Aspen.”

Bass looks up at me with guilty eyes. “Actually, I think I need a minute without her.”

I know that’s my cue. My cue to walk away and give him the space he needs to figure out his life. I just hope once that happens, there is still room for me in it.

“Take him out,” I say to Sawyer. “Get him drunk. Make sure he gets home safely.”

Sawyer nods. “I’m on it. I’ll crash on his couch and go to the game from there tomorrow morning.”

“Thanks for taking care of him,” I say.

“No problem. See you at the game?” he asks.

“Yeah, okay,” I say insincerely, knowing that, just like Bass, I need to figure out my life. And I need distance. Lots and lots of distance.

~ ~ ~

I walk into the townhouse much earlier than I expected to tonight. I wonder what Sawyer and Bass are doing. I wish I were with them. But I’m glad I’m not.