“Can I tell you something and you promise you won’t lose respect for me?”

Naomi’s eyes widened. “Wow, sounds juicy.” She put the rest of her pretzel in her mouth and leaned her arms against the picnic table. “Sure, I would never lose respect for you.”

Sofia took a deep breath and wondered if she should. It was killing her, and she hadn’t told anyone. Not even Sarah, who she normally confided in when it came to her relationship with Eric. She was just too ashamed. Naomi, at least, was more detached from the whole situation. She hadn’t even met Eric.

“I did something I regret so bad.” She bit her lip. Naomi watched her, but didn’t say anything. “I kissed another guy.”

Naomi’s eyes widened again, but she still didn’t say anything. She seemed to be waiting for Sofia to continue. Sofia briefed her on her history with Brandon. Then she told her about the kiss and about the part she felt most guilty about—the fact that she had wanted it. That in that moment, she’d wanted more.

“I don’t know why I didn’t just say no. All I kept saying was I can’t.” She shook her head, feeling a weight in her chest. The same weight she’d felt since that day. She thought maybe telling someone might lift it somehow, but it hadn’t.

“Sofia.” Naomi reached across the table and touched her hand. “It’s okay. It was a new experience for you. He was trying to seduce you, honey.” She giggled. “Sounds like it almost worked, too. A lesser woman might’ve given in, you know.”

“But I did give in,” Sofia argued, “I let him kiss me… touch me. And… I touched him back. It was—exciting. ”

God, how could she live with herself? If she ever found out Eric did something like that, she’d die. She put her hand over her face.

“But you stopped, Sof. A lot of women wouldn’t have.” Naomi pulled Sofia’s hand away from her face. “Listen, we’ve talked about this. So you were curious. It sounds to me like you had a deep-seeded crush on this guy from way back. The opportunity presented itself when you least expected it. And I hate to say it, but I think he may have taken advantage of it.”

Sofia stared at her, confused. “Why do you think that?”

nd hisofia stare

“Well, you said you always thought he was smarter than most people gave him credit for, right?”

Sofia nodded, thinking about it.

“I’m sure he picked up on the fact that he made you a little nervous even back in high school. Then he comes back and you said he made you feel things you shouldn’t be feeling.” Naomi shrugged. “He probably picked up on that, too. Sofia, you’re a very attractive girl, no guy would pass up the opportunity to at least try to kiss you, if they thought they had a chance.”

Sofia wanted to be mad. She really did. If Brandon tried to seduce her even after saying he respected that she was with Eric, that was pretty low down. But the truth was if Naomi was right, it was her own fault. She gave him the initial green light and he just went for it. Hell, he even gave her the opportunity to stop him and she hadn’t.

***

That Friday, Eric was not getting out early, so he wouldn’t be home until the next morning. Sofia still hadn’t been out to run in the back walkway since the kiss. She hadn’t planned on going back out there until Brandon was gone, but after her conversation with Naomi, she knew she wouldn’t feel better until she did something.

She folded the paper with Brandon’s poem on it, and stuck it in her shorts pocket. Her morning run had been extra early today. She hadn’t been able to sleep anymore so she got up and took off to the beach. After thinking about it during her entire run, she made up her mind.

Alex was in the kitchen, making a protein drink like he usually did every morning. He turned to her as she walked in. “Why are you up so early?”

“Couldn’t sleep,” was all she responded as she grabbed the knob to the back door.

“I thought you just came from running.”

“I did.” She turned it only to find it locked.

“So where you going now?”

Annoyed at his questioning, Sofia turned the lock. She hated that even as an adult, Alex still questioned her constantly. “Brandon’s leaving tomorrow. I just wanted to tell him something before he leaves.”

“You’re not going out there to race him, are you?” The annoyance on his face was so typical. Neither he, nor Angel had said anything to her since Brandon brought it up, but the expressions on their faces that night said it all. They didn’t like it.

“No,” she said as she walked out. “I’ll be right back.”

Brandon was on his way back from the park. He was shirtless, and from the sweat that glistened over his body, she could tell he’d been running for a while. He had a headset on and wasn’t looking up. No way was she touching him to get his attention. Instead, she made the noise he usually made to call Troop, and the pup immediately tugged the leash to try to get to her. Brandon looked up.

In an instant, that sensual smile spread across his face. He pulled the ee pt tarphones out of his ears. “Hey, I didn’t think I’d be seeing you out here anymore.”

“I’m not here to run.”

His eyes took her in from top to bottom. He had to be wondering about her running gear. “I just came from running… at the beach.”

His smile seemed to wane a bit. “Listen Sofia, about what happened. I hope you’re not upset with me, I’m really sorry—”