Author: Molly McAdams

“I love you.”

“Love you too Chase.”

I stiffened when I saw an older woman sitting on Chase's counter, laughing flirtatiously with him, her hand on his arm, her leg brushing his every time she'd swing it. Chase saw me and his face lit up like he was looking at the most amazing person in the world, and I was confused that he hadn't looked like he'd been caught with his hand in the cookie jar.

“Come here babe!” When I got closer he wrapped his arms around me and kissed me soundly before turning me to the woman, “Harper this is Trish, Trish this is my beautiful Harper.”

“It's nice to meet you Trish.” I held out my hand and my face fell, eyes narrowing when she refused to say anything back or take my hand. She was blatantly giving me a once over with a nasty smirk on her painted face. “Or not.” I mumbled and dropped my hand. It reminded me of the day Chase had met Carter, except Chase hadn't even noticed what was happening, he was looking behind me talking to Jeff. I looked at Trish quickly again before turning away to join the guy’s conversation.

If I had to guess, she was still in her twenties and was painfully beautiful. She looked like a tatted up pin-up girl, and even if she hadn't been touching Chase, she would make me uneasy. I was pulling back from hugging Jeff when I heard a loud voice bellow from the back room.

“Do I see my baby mama?!”

Chase and I laughed as I accepted a big hug and kiss on the cheek from Brian.

“Where have you been? You're keeping my son away from me now?”

I patted my stomach and grinned, “Never, why else would we be here?”

“Sup little BJ” Brian rubbed my stomach and mock-punched Chase in the arm.

“Uh…BJ?” I questioned, eyebrow raised.

“Yeah, Brian Jr., that's what we're naming him.”

Chase, Jeff and I burst into laughter, “Did you already ask Marissa? I'm pretty sure she doesn't need another Brian to take care of.” Chase joked and pulled my back against his chest so he could wrap his arms around me and kiss my neck.

Take that Pin-up Barbie.

The four of us talked for a few minutes until Brian and Chase got customers, I turned to see Trish still hadn't moved from her spot on Chase's counter.

I had to leave anyway so I walked up and tried to make nice. “Well it was nice meeting you, I'm sure I'll see you around.” I offered my hand and once again, she didn't take it.

“I'll make sure to take care of your boyfriend for you when you're not around.” She straightened and her smile became genuine, “Hey buddy, great girl you've got here!”

“Yeah, isn't she? You gonna stay and watch babe?”

I clenched my teeth and turned to look at Chase. “No. I need to go meet Bree, I'll see you at home.”

“Alright, let me walk you out.” His customer was still looking at a book, so he wrapped an arm around me and led me outside. “Thanks for coming, they've all missed you.”

I nodded and grabbed for my keys.

“You okay?”

“Not really. No.” I took a deep breath in and out, “I don't like Trish.”

I've never once told Chase or Brandon I didn't like a girl they were friends with. Sure I'd gotten jealous when girls would hang off Brandon, but I'd usually just cut in and stop it. The pictures from Amanda had been a whole other story, but with both guys, I wasn't one of those girlfriends who told them I didn't want them hanging out with certain girls, because I knew I wouldn't listen to them if they told me not to hang out with certain guys. Carter being a prime example. It was pointless to be like that, and it made you look insecure. But I could not stand the woman in there.

“What? Trish is awesome, why don't you like her?”

“It might have been the fact that she refused to return my greeting, or that she let me know she was going to “take care” of you while I'm not around.”

Chase laughed and pulled me in close, “Aw, Princess, she's just joking with you. You don't have anything to worry about, she's gay.”

“I promise you, she isn't.”

“Yeah she is, she told me yesterday.”

“Okay Chase.” I shook my head and hugged him back. He was really going to fall for that? I knew flirting when I saw it, and I knew exactly what she meant with her little comment. If he wanted to believe she was gay, then by all means. “I really do have to go, I love you. See you when you get home.”

He kissed me softly, pulling away far enough to look at my eyes, “Cheer up baby, I love you too.”

I grumbled to myself the entire way to meet up with Bree, and after giving her a play by play of what had just gone down, she called the pin-up girl a bitch and said we'd have to go check her out on another night to see if she'd do that again. I smiled widely at my best friend. She always had my back. I was trying to stop choking on my tea and laughing from Bree’s ridiculous scenarios of beating up Trish when Derek, Zach and Brandon walked in to the café.

They ordered their food and caught sight of us while they were waiting and came over to say hello. Zach and Derek hugged both of us, but Brandon just stood there never saying a word. He wasn’t coming across as rude, all you had to do was take one look at his face and you understood why he wasn’t adding to the conversation. His hazel eyes were full of so much pain and longing, I couldn’t stop looking at them. It was like a train wreck you didn’t want to see, but couldn’t take your eyes off of. He opened his mouth, but quickly shut it and walked over to the to-go counter to grab the food and leave. Derek gave me a sad smile and kissed the top of my head before towing Zach outside.

“You still love him.” Bree stated when they were gone.

I looked at her, afraid she was going to get mad at me, but she reached across the small table and grabbed my hand.

“It’s okay Harper, no one expected you to fall out of love with him. It’s a difficult situation.”

“I hate what I’ve done Bree.”

She nodded and squeezed my hand, “Do you still love him as much as you did before you broke up?”

I could have easily lied to her, but she would know, and she didn’t deserve to be lied to anymore by me, “More. So much more.”

“You love Chase too, right?” When I nodded she leaned forward to add, “And are you happy with him?”

“I am Bree. I don’t know how to explain how conflicted my emotions are.”

“You don’t have to friend. I think I’m starting to understand it, and I’m sorry you’re going through this. This is one big cluster-fuck you’ve created, but you’re dealing with it the best you can.” I opened my mouth but she stopped me, “I know you love Chase and I know you’re not using him. I didn’t have to ask that to be sure, I was just trying to see your reaction to each one. I know you’ll be happy with my brother, and you’ll love him better than anyone ever could. But I understand that you’ll never get over Brandon, we all do…Chase included. People fall in and out of love all the time, and sometimes people have numerous loves throughout their lives. But you have two epic loves and no matter who you were with, I don’t think you’d ever get over or forget the other.”

“Do you think I’m a horrible person?” Because I sure as hell feel like one.

“Not at all. And you shouldn’t either.” She raised a perfectly shaped brow at me. She knew me so well.

***

The next night we were sitting around the kitchen table, picking at fruit and listening to Bree recap on a story of some crazy person she'd run into downtown while she was with Konrad. Chase laughed out loud and asked Bree if she'd given the dancing homeless person money when I felt something weird. My entire body froze and I glanced down to my stomach.

“Are you kidding? Of course we did! That lady was hilarious, there was no way we weren't giving her money.” Bree got out of her chair and tried to recreate the dance for us.

Chase laughed and again that weird feeling happened. I froze again, and glanced down before taking quick glances at everyone else. I don't know why I'd think they would be aware of whatever was going on inside me, but no one was looking my way. I was staring at my rounding stomach and only partially paying attention to what Robert was saying. As soon as Chase started talking, there were two somethings and I gasped, reaching out for Chase.

“You okay?” They all said at once.

“Say something Chase.” I whispered, eyes still glued to my shirt.

He leaned close, trying to look at my face, “Sweetie, what's wrong?”

I sucked in a deep breath and started laughing, “He's kicking! He's kicking whenever you talk!”

Chase fell out of his chair and to his knees, his hands covering my stomach. He leaned close to my belly and started talking slowly to him. I felt another kick just as Chase's head shot back, his eyes wide, “Oh my God!” His face instantly went back to my stomach and he continued to talk and laugh whenever he felt the nudge.

Everyone took their turns with their hands on my stomach, and by the time Chase went back to having his hands on me, there was only one more kick. “I think he rolled over.” I don't know why I was whispering, but Chase had been the only one talking, and his voice had been so low it felt weird to break that silence. “That was incredible!” I laughed as Chase stood up to kiss me long and slow.

“My thoughts exactly.” He whispered and went back to kissing me.

When we told Dr. Lowdry about that the next morning, she raised her eyebrow. “Wait, you're saying everyone else felt it too?”

“Yes.” We said together, still smiling.

“I'm sorry, I guess I just hadn't realized that at first. Harper, normally moms feel the baby move around fifteen weeks, but for first time mothers it's normal not to feel anything until you're twenty weeks. Which is how far along you are, correct?” I nodded and she continued, “So you're right on track with that, but normally no one else can feel it for another two and a half weeks, at the earliest.”