“Oh, no,” the other woman said. “That’s not good. How late are you?”

“Just a couple of days.”

“Okay, you have a couple of choices. You can buy more tests and see what they say, or you can wait. I know it’s hard, but that would be my advice. Wait about a week and take the tests again. Your final option is to make an appointment with your doctor.”

Marina thanked the woman and hung up. Going to her doctor wasn’t an option. He was practically a friend of the family and her mother worked in his office. That was a little too close to home for this situation. She could find another doctor, but by the time they fit her in, at least a week would have passed anyway. Waiting and taking the tests again made the most sense.

But being sensible didn’t ease the knot in her stomach to make her breathe any easier. Pregnant? Was it possible?

She was torn between the maternal thrill of a baby and the horror of knowing what Todd would think about her. That she’d tricked him.

Needing to talk to someone, she picked up the phone and called Willow.

Her sister’s cell went right to voice mail, which meant Willow was probably with Kane and they were practicing for making babies of their own.

Restless and still needing to talk, Marina walked to her laptop and turned it on.

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Hi. It’s the middle of the day here, so I’m thinking it’s the middle of the night there. Which is a serious drag because I really need to talk. Not that we will, and I don’t want you to call. It’s about a billion dollars a minute and I’ll be in class most of tomorrow. It’s just…

Okay—don’t be drinking your morning coffee when you read this. I’m late. As in…late. So I got a couple of pregnancy tests and took them. One says I’m pregnant, one says I’m not. The lady at the company suggested I wait another week and retest, which really makes sense. Except wait a week to know? How is that possible?

I want kids. I really wouldn’t mind being pregnant—except for Todd. He’s not a trusting guy and while I don’t blame him, I can’t begin to imagine what he would say if I told him I was pregnant. He would think I was trying to manipulate him or trick him. It would be awful.

Even worse…and you can’t tell anyone about any of this, but especially what I’m about to say. I think I’m in love with him.

Marina paused in her typing, then sighed.

No. That’s wrong. I know I’m in love with him. I’ve been in love with him for a while now. Maybe from the beginning. I’m excited and scared. I mean, what if I’m like Mom? But what if I’m not? What if I can’t be strong? So that’s a good possibility. But this is Todd. Would he ever trust me enough to have a real relationship? Is he even interested in a real relationship? And if he could be, being pregnant will ruin everything.

So that’s how my day is going. E-mail me back when you can. I feel better now that we’ve “talked.” Thanks for listening.

Marina didn’t sleep much that night, which made her morning class on the physical aspects of Inorganic Chemistry class tough. She did her best to clear her mind of all that was currently going on in her life and pay attention to the lecture. She seemed to do okay, because Jason, one of her deaf students, only frowned at her twice.

When class ended, she made arrangements to meet him in the lab later that week, then walked toward her car. As she moved through the crowd of students, her mind swirled and dipped and raced in a hundred different directions.

What if she was pregnant? How would she tell Todd? What if she wasn’t? Would she be sad?

She felt her emotions being ripped in two. She loved Todd and would be thrilled to be having a baby with him. But with his past, she doubted they could ever get past his inherent mistrust of all women, including her. So the most sensible thing to hope was that there was no baby. Except she couldn’t quite bring herself to want that.

Sleep, she thought as she walked across the parking lot. She needed sleep.

What she got was a familiar expensive convertible pulling up next to her. The driver’s window rolled down and a very angry-looking Todd stared at her.

“Get in,” he said flatly. “We have to talk.”

Eleven

He knew. She could read it in the coldness in his eyes.

Marina wasn’t surprised. There was no way Julie wouldn’t have told Ryan, and Ryan and Todd were as close as brothers.

“I’ll follow you to your place,” she said, knowing there was a very good chance that any conversation with Todd right now wasn’t going to go well. Better to be able to leave and not have to wait for him to drive her anywhere.

He opened his mouth, but before she could speak, she added, “I’ll follow you there. You should at least trust me that much.”

“Why?” he asked bluntly. But he also closed the window and drove a few feet forward so she could back out her car.

Twenty minutes later she drove onto the familiar circular stone driveway in front of the massive house she’d actually grown to like. But as she climbed out her car, she felt an uncomfortable combination of apprehension and panic. Based on all that she knew about him, Todd wasn’t going to handle any of this well.

They walked inside without saying anything. She figured that she should probably be the one to start the conversation, but she didn’t know how. Nor did she know what he knew. Which might be a good place to start.

She followed Todd into his study and set her purse on one of the leather chairs in the book-lined space.

“Did Ryan give you a recap or just forward my mail?” she asked, suddenly remembering her confession of love. Surely Julie hadn’t shared that with her fiancé.

“He gave me the facts.” Todd’s dark gaze dropped to her midsection. “That you think you’re pregnant.”

She couldn’t figure out what he was thinking from his tone. So far, his body language seemed controlled enough, so she should be feeling better. Except she wasn’t. There was a coldness, a bitterness, that seemed to steal all the warmth from the room. Despite the pleasant temperature, she found herself shivering.

“I don’t know if I am,” she said. “He told you about the two pregnancy tests?”

Todd moved behind his desk, then turned to face her. “Let me be clear. I’ve been manipulated by women far more experienced than you, Marina. You will not win this game.”

She felt as if she’d been slapped. “I’m not playing a game. How could I be? I’m not like that and you know it. You know me, Todd.”

“Do I? You’re the one who’s in this for a million dollars.”

She stared at him. “Don’t be ridiculous. That’s just a crazy idea of Ruth’s.”

“She offered to take the money off the table, but you told her no.”

Coldness eased down her spine. “I was kidding. It was a joke.”

Nothing in his expression hinted that he believed her. The walls seemed to close in a little.

She took a step toward him. “This is crazy. We’ve become friends. We’ve laughed together, we’d talked about our hopes and dreams. I’m not some manipulating bitch out for the money. Dammit, Todd, I didn’t trap you. You wanted us to make love, too. You were a more than willing participant.”

He opened a desk drawer and pulled out a pad of paper. “If you continue to claim to be pregnant, I’ll want the condition confirmed by an independent test performed by a doctor of my choosing. I will be there for the test, as will my attorney.”

“Claim to be pregnant?” she asked, her voice low and shaky. “I’m saying I don’t know. How much more honest can I be?”

He ignored that, too.

“If you are pregnant, I want paternity determined by a DNA test upon birth. If I am the father, we’ll have to negotiate some kind of custody arrangement.” He stared at her. “I wouldn’t count on winning that battle if I were you.”

It was like being locked in a freezer. The chill made it nearly impossible to breathe.

She closed her eyes as she remembered his words about wanting children, but not a mother. Was that really his plan? To take her baby?

“This isn’t about me,” she told him. “None of this is. This is about your past. You’re making me pay for what those other women did to you.”

“Did my aunt offer to withdraw the million dollars?” he asked.

She couldn’t win. He wouldn’t let her. “Yes.”

“Did you tell her to keep it on the table.”

“Yes.”

There was no point in explaining she’d been kidding. That she’d never imagined even liking him, let alone falling for him.

“It’s like asking for the moon,” she said, even as she knew she was wasting breath and energy. “Sure, I said I’d take it but it was like accepting an offer to raise the Titanic. It’s not going to happen. The money isn’t real.”

She took another step toward him, although with a giant desk between them, it was a pretty useless gesture.

“I wanted to give my sister a great wedding,” she said. “Just like you wanted to give that to Ryan. We had to work together. At first I didn’t like you very much, but then we became friends and it was great. That’s all, Todd. Don’t make it ugly now.”

“Give me one reason why I should trust you.”

“You can’t argue trust. It has to be earned over time. Tell me one thing I’ve done to violate your trust.”

“I can give you a million of them. You getting pregnant only confirms what you wanted all along.”

Horror swept through her. “It was a joke,” she began, then stopped. What was the point?

She grabbed her purse and pulled out her cell phone. Ruth’s number was in her address book. She hit Send.

“Hi, it’s Marina,” she said, when Ruth had answered. “I need to tell you I’m not interested in the million dollars. Whatever happens, I don’t want it.”

Her grandmother sighed. “You never did want it, dear. I knew that.”

“Todd doesn’t.”

“Oh, yes. He can be stubborn. But he’ll come around.”

Marina stared at his stern expression, at the starkness in his eyes. “I’m not so sure about that.”

“I know he seems like he’s too much work, but he’ll be worth it in the end. Have a little faith.”

“I’ll try.” She hung up.

Faith. Was there enough of that in the world?

“It doesn’t mean anything,” he told her. “You know you can get even more money from me.”

And then she got it. She couldn’t win. That was the point.

“If it wasn’t the pregnancy concern, it would have been something else,” she said, more to herself than him. “You’re determined to never trust me and people always find what they go looking for. If you expect the worst, you’ll find it.”

She drew in a breath. “Someday I’ll appreciate the irony of this situation. I’ve been so worried about being like my mother. I’ve been terrified I’ll lose myself in a man. I never stopped to think about the danger of falling for someone who couldn’t love me back. In my head, I was the one with the big problem.”

She shoved her cell phone into her jeans pocket and grabbed her purse. “But I’m not. I was willing to risk it with you. I was scared and worried, but still willing to take on that next step. I never stopped to think all my fears didn’t matter. Because you’re not willing.”

His expression didn’t change. She wasn’t sure why she was explaining herself, except maybe for some kind of closure.

“The only way to convince you I’m not in it for the money is to not be pregnant and never see you again,” she said. “I can’t do anything about having or not having a baby, but I can get out of your life. If I really am pregnant, we’ll work something out. Something fair. You’re not going to simply take my child. If I’m not, then we only have to deal with each other at the wedding and then stay out of each other’s lives.”

She walked to the study door, then turned back. “I know you’re scared, Todd. I’m scared, too. But after falling in love with you, I’m willing to face my fears. Maybe I’m not the one for you. Maybe you don’t want to care about me, and that’s fine. But if you never care about anyone, the bitches of the world win. They might not have you, but they’ve sure made sure no one else will, either. It’s a hell of a way for you to live.”

He waited until he heard the front door close before walking out of the study. The emptiness of the house pressed down on him, but was nothing when compared to the fury he felt at her betrayal. If there was one woman he was going to trust, it would have been Marina. Only she’d turned out to be just like the rest of them.

Pregnant, he thought grimly. Fine. If she wanted to play that game, he would play it right back. He would take the baby and start the family he’d always wanted. She would be compensated, but nothing else.

She was, he acknowledged, a good genetic candidate for his child’s mother. Intelligent, healthy, determined. He would hire a nanny and be a father.

It was a plan and he always felt better when he had a plan. But not today. He had a hole in his chest and it burned.

He wanted to throw something. He wanted to put his fist through a wall. He wanted her not to be like them. He wanted to trust her.

Which he couldn’t.