“Then I stay with you.”

“Can’t I at least—”

“No.”

Biting my lip, I kept quiet as Kerrick and Ryne discussed routes and strategy. Relieved to have company for my final days, I still worried over the unnecessary risk of sending the others on without Kerrick. Since changing Kerrick’s mind was impossible, I decided to stop fretting over everyone else. It was time for me to be selfish for once.

In the morning, I pulled Danny and Zila aside. I gave Danny my journal, explaining as much about healing and a healer’s powers as I could.

“I’m sorry, but I won’t be here to teach you, but when you feel that tug, that desire to help another, to heal him, just let it go.” I described the sensation.

Danny didn’t like the idea of leaving me.

“Don’t worry,” I said. “These men are good. They’re going to heal the world.”

“But no one likes healers,” Zila said. She was unusually subdued.

“If you develop the power, they’ll accept you both. You’re not tainted by the past. You’ll be considered miracles.” I hugged them. “You are miracles.” Then I said goodbye to Ryne, Quain and Loren and shooed them all on their way before I cried.

Kerrick accompanied them for a bit, showing them the path. When he returned it seemed as if the cavern warmed. Or it could be due to the plague. Stage one had lasted seven days, and I was three days into stage two. I estimated I had another five days until stage three. Five days with Kerrick and then…

“Finally, I have you all to myself,” he said, sitting next to me.

“So what do you want to do? Play cards, plot how you can defeat Tohon, or reminisce?”

Instead of answering, he drew me down with him onto my bedroll and kissed me. Passion and desire flared, igniting a fever within me. A good fever that prompted me to tug at his clothes with impatience.

He broke off the kiss and grinned. “Easy.”

“Not this time.” My hands sought skin.

Once I pulled his shirt off, I ran my fingers over his smooth back. He yanked off my tunic and distracted me from my explorations by kissing my neck. Soon there was nothing between us. Kerrick took the lead as I had no experience.

But I caught on quick. Every part of my body hummed and sang with his every movement. Waves of delightful heat pounded through me. When he whispered my name, shivers raced along my skin.

Afterward we lay together, still entwined. My aches and pains forgotten and replaced by a contented tingle.

Half-asleep, I protested when he moved, turning so he was behind me. Tucking me close, he pulled a blanket over us.

“Better?” he asked, draping an arm over my shoulder.

I snuggled against him. “Yes.”

Unable to remain still for long, he swept my hair from my face and smoothed it. “After all that has happened, I can’t believe you’re here with me.”

“I’m having a hard time believing it, as well.”

“You were with Tohon for twenty-seven days. He could have done anything to you. And when I saw you kissing him, I feared the worst.”

“All he managed was a couple of kisses.”

“I know now. But that wasn’t it. I feared I had lost you without ever telling you how I felt.”

“Is that why you risked your life to talk to me in the garden?”

“Yes, and then you didn’t say a word.”

“You surprised me. Plus I wanted to keep everyone at a distance. I’d already decided to heal Ryne. Being close to someone would make it that much more difficult for me to give up my life for Ryne.”

“Yet, you didn’t hesitate to heal him. Does that mean—?”

I rolled over to face him. “No, it doesn’t. Despite my best intentions, I spent those twenty-seven days thinking of you. Every day I smelled spring sunshine and living green. Drove me crazy.”

He looked confused.

“That’s your scent. It’s imprinted on me and I can’t get enough of it.”

“I thought you said I stunk?”

“I lied.”

A slow smile curled his lips. “Prove it.”

I did. In fact, I proved it multiple times over the next four days. It was the best four days of my entire life. I thought it a perfect way to spend the time.

Reality hit me in the form of a sudden convulsion early on the fifth morning. I had entered the third and final stage of the plague.

When Kerrick returned from washing up, I worked on one of my juggling stones. Using a rock and a throwing knife, I chiseled my name into the opposite side of Flea’s. I thought it fitting that we would share the stone.

“What are you doing?” he asked.

I finished and blew the dust from the grooves. “Here.” Handing him the three rocks, I said, “Please give them to Belen. Tell him he was right. They’re keepers.”

“Avry—”

“And if you can find my sister, please give this to her. I’d ask you to sit on her until she reads it, but I fear she’s stubborn like me. Oh, and give my gloves, boots and cloak to Danny. They should fit him next winter.”

“Avry—”

“My pouch is filled with Loren and Quain’s favorite herbs and spices, so make sure they get it back. I don’t have anything for Zila, but when you get to a safe place, please buy her a bunch of hair ribbons for me.”

“Avry—”

“You can have my stiletto and throwing knives. I—”