Author: Nyrae Dawn

“Aw, so she’s the reason you’ve been distracted all night?”

I glanced at Crystal, back over at Aspen and then at Crystal again. “I haven’t been distracted.” Yeah right.

“It’s okay.” She sighed. “I think I was using you to get my mind off Will, so we’re even.”

This time, my vision jerked toward her. “What? I’m not into her. She’s my B--” I groaned. Why did I keep saying BFF? I swear, it was like Paris Hilton took me over. “She’s my friend. I watch out for her. That’s all.”

In the sea of people, I found Aspen again. She stood up on her tip-toes and whispered in the guy’s ear. “Dude, what’s she doing?”

I didn’t realize I’d spoken out loud until Crystal answered me. “Flirting.” Aspen stumbled. “She looks a little drunk.”

“Nah, we have a three drink rule in the PPP.”

“PPP?”

“Pre-party plan. She doesn’t drink much anyway. I don’t think she’s ever gone past one drink.” A memory popped into my head. “Oh! There was this one time Pris’s parents were out of town. I dared her to drink this fierce drink Jaden made and she was gone. Stumbling all over the place like--” Holy hell. Like she was doing now. “I gotta go.”

Crystal grabbed my arm as I tried to walk away. “I guess I was wrong, you do believe in love.”

“Pfft.” I tried not to roll my eyes. I didn’t do love and if I did, it wouldn’t be with my best friend. “It’s not that. She’s just a friend.” My mouth felt all sticky. As I looked over, a hand grabbed onto Aspen’s arm and started leading her down the hall. Not going to happen, dumbass. I pushed my way through the crowd, grabbing him right before they made it to a door. “Thanks, bro. I got her from here.”

His eyes narrowed at me. “Who the hell are you?”

I ignored him. “Come on, Woodstock. Let’s get you out of here.” Standing this close to her, I could see she was definitely trashed. Her big, green eyes were droopy, with pink tinting the white part.

“I’m okay, Baaaasssstian. Tad’s just helping me find a bathroom.” She patted his chest.

“Well, now I am. You can go,” I told him. About then, Aspen grabbed her stomach. “Oh, crap. I think I’m going to get sick.” She swayed a little. About that time, Tad took off and I pushed the door open. Bathroom my ass, it was a bedroom with a big empty bed. I’d have to remember his face so I could kick his ass next time I saw him.

“Uggg.” Aspen groaned.

“We’ll get you to the bathroom.” She stumbled so I picked her up, pushing doors open until I found the bathroom. When she was on her feet, I locked the door behind us and that’s when it happened. Instead of aiming for the toilet, Aspen faced me. Green puke flew all over my not-so-lucky-anymore shirt. Ugh! She freaking owed me for this. I turned her toward the toilet and let her finish. With her hair in my hands, she emptied her stomach. I kept feeling it threaten to bubble up in my throat, but I held it down. Puke and I didn’t go well together. The last thing we needed was one of us up-chucking in the toilet while the other took the bathtub.

When she finally finished, I helped her to her knees, rubbing her back. Please don’t puke. Please don’t puke. What was it with girls and alcohol? Boys always get the bad name, but I’d never drank so much I blew chunks. “It’s okay,” I told her when she started to cry.

“I hate being sick,” Aspen mumbled. I kept smoothing her hair down and sliding my hand over her back.

“You okay?”

“No…” her eyes were starting to close, but she kept popping them open again.

“I’m here, Woodstock. Are you going to be sick again?”

She shook her head. I grabbed some tissue, wet it and wiped her face. I felt like an idiot, but I knew she wouldn’t want to go out there like this. I pulled off both my shirts, and tossed my puke covered, Beastie Boys shirt in the trash, before putting the other one back on. I wanted to cry myself. That was a nice shirt. “I’m going to pick you up.” She mumbled something which I assumed was an okay. Bending down, I pulled her into my arms. “Let’s get you home.” Her reply was to wrap her arms around my neck.

Everywhere that she touched me, it was like little currents of electricity sparked beneath my skin. It was weird as hell, but kind of felt good, too. As soon as I hit the front door, both Jaden and Pris were by my side.

“What happened?” Pris asked. At the same time, Jaden said, “Is she okay?”

“We’re good. Just a little too much to drink.”

When we got to the car, Jaden somehow made sure Aspen was strapped in, while she was still lying down with her head in my lap.

“I don’t know how I’m going to get her into my house like that, Bastian. My parents will freak,” Pris said from the front seat.

I pushed her soft hair away from her face. “She can come home with me. I’m pretty sure my mom’s out.”

Pris dropped us all off at my place. Jaden stayed downstairs, planning to sleep on the couch, and I carried Aspen up to my room. After I had her all tucked in, I started to walk away.

“Bastian… Don’t go.” Her voice was hardly over a whisper.

I closed my door and locked it. “I’m right here.”

A smile curved her lips and then she was out. There was nothing I could do but fall into my torn-up computer chair and wonder how I got myself into this mess. The goal for the night had been freedom. To find a girl who was interested, listen to music, dance and get my mind off of all this other heavy stuff: to forget mom and the loser, to forget my Aspen confusion, to help Jaden block out whatever was going on at home. Instead, I ended up with green vomit on my not-so-lucky shirt and sitting in my cramped chair while I watched a girl sleep in my bed.

Here was my epicness, because despite how things turned out, I wouldn’t be anywhere else. I wouldn’t want anyone else to take care of her. To watch her sleep. To hold her hair. To carry her to the car. Of course, I could have done without the puke part for both of our sakes, but besides that, I’d rather be with her than anyone else. I’d rather be here than dancing with Crystal or any other girl.

That’s when it hit me. How had I been so dumb? How could I be such an idiot? And when the hell did it happen? When had things changed or had they always been like this, but I didn’t realize it?

Looked like I did do love and I was in it with my best friend.

I was so fucked.

Chapter Eight

Now, I’m not a scientist or anything, but I figured every theory needed to be tested. And so far, that’s what the whole think-I’m-in-love-with-my-best-friend thing was—a theory. I mean, I’d never been in love before. How did I know for sure? It could have been lack of female attention, rebellion, or, I don’t know, delirium or something. Stranger things had happened. Jumping to the conclusion it was love, was just a… what’s it called? Hypothesis? My science teacher would be so proud. The way I saw it, I wasn’t educated enough in love to make an educated guess about it. Especially since I wasn’t even sure I believed in it.

I wasn’t sure I’d ever really seen anyone in love before. My dad obviously didn’t love my mom, since he bailed on us. He obviously hadn’t loved me either. Mom thought she was in love a lot, but look how all those relationships turned out. Either people put too much stock in something that was so easy to fall in and out of or love and my family just didn’t jive. Before I pledged my undying devotion (not that I’d ever do that), but before I decided if I wanted to do anything about this or not, I needed to figure it out.

The thing was, I wasn’t sure how to do that. Would ignoring her, showing up where she was or flirting with her do the trick like it did with my clients? I could always try making out with her, which I’d enjoy a whole lot, but:

1. I was pretty sure if I started kissing Aspen out of the blue, I’d be talking with a high pitched voice when she finished with me.

2. Love wasn’t supposed to only be about kissing, right? I mean, I did that with the other girls and I knew damn well I didn’t love them.

The Hook-up Doctor was in uncharted territory and it sucked.

I clicked the red square in the right corner of my inbox. PA hadn’t replied back to me, so I didn’t know how her attempted flirt-fest had gone. Hopefully, it worked out for her. At least somebody should get what they wanted, even if I wasn’t. Of course, that could be because I had no idea what that was, but why keep score?

When I turned to walk toward my closet to get my guitar, a soft rapping came from my bedroom door. I groaned knowing it would be my mom. I so wasn’t in the mood for her shiny-happy-people impersonation today. I made a quick U-turn anyway and opened the door. “Hey, Ma.”

“Hey, kiddo. Do you work today?” She walked into my room and stole my chair. I plopped down on my bed, figuring we must be due for some big, important conversation that I had no interest in having. She never came into my room, so this had to be big. Fear trickled through me, gaining speed. Had Roger asked her? Was she getting married? Had he broken up with her? Hurt her? I bit all that back and answered her question instead.

“In a couple hours. What’s up?” I tried to focus on my bed and how it still smelled like Aspen’s cinnamon. I took a big whiff and at the same time, realized I’d totally freakin’ lost my mind. I was trying to sniff my bed? If this was love, it really screwed with you.

“Are you still going to be with Jaden this weekend?” She looked nervous, picking at something on her skirt. Uh-oh. Here we go. The fear gained strength.

“Yeah.”

“Roger asked me to go away with him for the weekend. We’re thinking a little bed and breakfast by the coast and--”

I held up my hand. “Really don’t want the details, Ma.” Especially when I could think of my own. Not the do-not-disturb kind because that made me want to vomit in my mouth, but if old Rog wanted to propose, a weekend at a little bed and breakfast at the coast would be the perfect time for him to do it. Jerk. What was the point in asking me if he didn’t plan to wait for my reply?

I couldn’t say any of that though. Not only did she not know I knew, but I could see the sparkles in her eyes and the last thing I wanted to do was be the one to dim them. So I shrugged. “Sure. Whatever. I won’t be here anyway.” It didn’t even strike me as weird that Mom was pretty much asking my permission to go away with a guy. She did a lot of stuff I didn’t agree with, but we’d always been a team. Whenever some chump broke her heart, I was the one who helped her put it back together again. That’s just how we worked.

A smile stretched across her face. “He’s special, Sebastian. Really, Roger is different.”

My eyes automatically started to roll, but I stopped them when a picture of Woodstock slipped into my head. I tried to push it out, but it kept playing over and over. Glue stuck my mouth together, and it was like part of me wanted to pry it open, but the other part wanted to clamp it shut. How lame would it be to ask my mom about girls? Hell, I knew more about women than guys like Roger who were twice my age. But this wasn’t just a girl, it was Aspen. She was different.

I peeked around my room, half-expecting to see a hidden camera or Jaden camped out in the corner to catch me slipping. When I was sure we were alone, I scratched an invisible itch on my head so my arms blocked my vision of Mom sitting across from me. “So, how do you, um… know you love him or whatever?”

I felt like such a loser. I was The Hook-up Doctor. I was supposed to know girls. Know myself, and here I was, asking my mom how she knew when she was in love. When did my life become such an epic fail? When did I lose control of everything?